


This house is haunted

by thesmallfangirl



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Fluff and Angst, Historical Inaccuracy, Historical References, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-30
Updated: 2018-05-28
Packaged: 2019-01-26 21:09:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 24,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12566228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesmallfangirl/pseuds/thesmallfangirl
Summary: when Sebastian loses his house to debt collectors, after his father squandered everything. Sebastian is found homeless, however when a mysterious letter is received; mere hours after the debt collectors arrive; Sebastian is thrown a life line.  but will this prove to be Sebastian's salvation or his final destruction and just who lends there homes to strangers?sorry for the bad summary and any english errors





	1. the express delivery

**Author's Note:**

> a new fic!!! histrorical fic, sorry for any english errors its not my first language. (also being gay in this universe is absolutely no biggy)

Sebastian Vettel ran a hand through his hair. This was a complete unmitigated disaster, just as he knew it would be. When he had inherited this whole stupid estate he should have done what any man with half a brain would have done upon the discovery that his estates where riddled with debt and sold the whole sorry thing, thus making it someone else’s problem. Then, after doing such fled to France to live under an assumed name, it wasn’t unusual he knew of at least 3 of his contemporaries who had done the exact same thing. But no, he Sebastian Vettel, had thought himself better than that.  
He had kept the estate with the assumption that with enough hard work and time he would be able to overturn the complete disaster that his father had turned them into. He really should have not been so naïve, such this was his punishment. The whole thing had turned into a complete mess and now he had debtors ready to turn him out of his own home. His valet was busy packing what little he could fit onto the back of the pony and trap they had been able to convince the debtors that they did not need. Sebastian, at this time found himself completely useless, his hands where shaking and he felt rather as if he would like to curl up in the corner of the room that he no longer owned and cry himself to sleep.  
His valet a kind older man by the name of Jensen had been remarkably calm about the whole thing, sitting Sebastian down while he ran about the house shoving as much of Sebastian’s things and many of the more valuable items into bags, before any of the debtors set eyes on them. Sebastian wondered why he was doing it, it wasn’t as if Sebastian would be able to pay him anymore. The Valet would do himself good to begin looking for a new position as fast as he could, but no the kind man had insisted he take care of Sebastian. Stating “if I don’t take care of you boy lord knows who will”  
It had been the first time in his life that Sebastian was not sure where he would sleep that night, he had no idea where he would go. His parents, having long past away, his brother disappeared into lord know where in Spain. Fabian wrote only on an annual basis and seemed to be inclined to keep his contact with his now very much estranged family to the absolute minimum; so of course he would be of no help to Sebastian.  
Sebastian doubted that Fabien would even receive his letter before he starved on the streets somewhere. His only option was to ride up to his sister’s house in Scotland, and pray that she could be prevailed upon to forget her grievances with the family long enough for Sebastian to explain his situation. If he was lucky she may eventually be persuaded to allow Sebastian the pleasure of sleeping in the stables.  
Jenson choice that moment to knock on the door to the drawing room “excuse me sir, Sebastian….” Sebastian looked up at him and Jensen felt a stab of pity the young man looked truly awful.  
“Yes Jensen, I assume you need to tender your resignation” asked Sebastian, it would hardly be the first one, almost all of the staff had stated that there services where requited elsewhere the moment the debt collectors appeared on Sebastian’s front porch.  
Jenson rolled his eyes “you are not getting rid of me that easily Mr Vettel, I’ve been looking after your sorry ass for 10 years now and quite frankly I don’t know what you would do without me. No sir I simply came to tell you that a letter just arrived for you via express delivery. Sounds pretty damn important.” The older man passed over a heavy feeling envelope to Sebastian before settling himself down on the coach clearly eager to discover the contents of the letter almost as eager as Sebastian himself was.  
Sebastian slid his hand over the paper, the letter was clearly from a wealthy sender. The paper was think and embellished along the edges in a manner that befitted a member of the aristocracy. Sebastian wondered who would have sent a letter to him express at such a sensitive time; a friend offering aid perhaps?  
He thought that the letter was abnormally heavy however as he slid his fingers over the letter to open it, very curious he thought. When he tipped up the envelope to get at the contents within, something heavy fell to the floor.  
“Heavens” said Jensen “what on earth was that?”  
Sebastian shrugged he hadn’t gotten a look at whatever was in the package before it fell to the floor. He fell to his knees beside the sofa; he thought that he had seen it fall under there, whatever it was. The ground beneath the coach was abnormally dusty, the maids who cleaned the day room had grown rather lazy of late, Sebastian could hardly blame them however, there pay was rarely coming at frequent intervals. After only two attempts at trying to fish out the contents of the express from under the sofa Sebastian dissolved into a fit of sneezes.  
Jenson laughed “ok princess allow me.”  
Sebastian shot him a glare “fairly sure I should have just allowed you to do it in the first place”  
Jenson who was now on his knees grabbling about under a dusty sofa grinned as his employer come friend “pay me then we can talk about the proper practices of servants”  
Sebastian paled at that “you know i……”  
“Got it” yelled Jensen pulling something out from underneath the coach “or at least I think I do” he frowned in confusion. “It’s a key what on earth has someone sent you a key via express delivery for.”  
Sebastian shrugged he hadn’t the foggiest “maybe the letter will explain” he said pulling out the missive that accompanied the key in the envelope.  
Jenson settled himself on the sofa as curious as Sebastian was about the whole unusual affair. Sebastian began to read the letter aloud  
Dear Mr Vettel  
I am sure that you are quite curious as to why I am writing to you, or perhaps you are more curious as to why you have just been sent a key. If you have any intelligence at all; which I am sure you do; you will wish to know the answer to the second question more than the first.  
Indeed I consider myself a generous man, so I will attempt to answer both questions as well as I can. I am writing to you because I have recently been made aware of your circumstances and dire as they are, I wish to be of some aid. Such is why you have been sent a key. I am under the impression that you have just had the misfortune of finding yourself homeless and I wish to be of service. The key is to a house that is no longer in much use; I have drafted the appropriate papers, in some haste I may add; to have the house given in lease owner ship to you. Worry yourself not, no payment will be required I only ask that you take care of the land and the people on it, such will be sufficient to me in leui of money.  
The directions to the house and sufficient papers as to your lease of the house are within the envelope  
**Sebastian rooted around, true to the senders words they were, Sebastian gasped in amazement such strange luck, what a peculiar event this was **  
I hope that you will take me up on this offer and hope that you will be comfortable in your new home. I am truly sorry you find yourself in such a position.  
Regards

The letter was unsigned, but Sebastian was sure it had been sent by a man the tone and hand had a decidedly masculine slant, and who other than a wealthy land owning male would be able to hand out houses to men he had never met, with no payment required what so ever. It was extraordinary.  
Sebastian looked at the address that had been given on the documents, he hadn’t the slightest clue where the hell this place was, it was nowhere close of that he was certain which begged the question, how had news of his estate failing travelled so far so quickly and why on earth would someone; who Sebastian was sure; had no idea who he was would want to help him.  
“Well” said Jensen, his jaw seemed to be weighted to the floor and his eyebrows all but swallowed up by his hairline “this is most unusual, you don’t suppose that this man in a lunatic do you?”  
Sebastian snorted; Jenson had rather hit the nail on the head there. “Indeed most unusual and I do hope he is not as we are to live in one of his houses” he responded  
Jenson leaned over “so what are you going to do” he asked  
Sebastian sighed “well, I do not seem to have much of a choice in that matter, I have no money and nowhere else to go. My brother is lord knows where and my sister wants nothing more to do with the family, not that I can say that I blame her. So well…. So it seems that I must at least go to see what the mysterious sender has to offer” he passed the letter over to his valet “have you any idea where this place is”  
Jenson blew out a large gust of air as he took the letter from his friend “very well but if the guy turns out to be a raging psychopath I am going to be so mad with you.” He made his way over to a stack of maps that were kept in the cabernet of the drawing room. After a while pulling out one that he seemed to deem the right one, “it’s in Derbyshire, of course it’s in bloody Derbyshire, god damn it I hate the north, you can never seem to get warm in that dratted county”  
Sebastian gave his valet a shocked look “you’re really coming with me”  
Jenson laughed “of course, like I said, you can’t get rid of me that easily, now put your coat on we have a long way to go. This guy’s place is in bloody Derbyshire…. And we are in Suffolk. Derbyshire, I hate Derbyshire why couldn’t we have gotten given a house in Cornwall, Derbyshire, hrmph. Come on then up with you we have a long way to go”  
Sebastian laughed following his valet out to the horse and trap that had been packed pull of all the few things that Sebastian either own or Jenson had been able to snag on the way out. Sebastian tucked the letter into his pocket with trembling fingers. He had no idea what this man would be like, what this house would be like. He had always believed that he would be able to right his father’s wrongs to fix everything and to bring his family back together; as it turned out he had simply messed up even more thoroughly than his father himself had managed.  
Jenson slung his arm around the young man as he urged the aged horse to begin its long journey north. “Just so you know in I reckon that this is the end of me calling you sir, your just plain old sebby now." He frowned at his friends devastated expression " it wasn’t your fault you know, none of this was your fault, that man had been sowing the seeds of this places destruction since before you were born sebby”  
Sebastian supposed that his friend was right but that didn’t help with the crushing feeling of guilt, that he’d somehow let everyone down.  
Sebastian smiled never the less, at least Jensen was here, he thought ,leaning his head against his friends shoulder at least he wouldn’t have to do this alone.  
“I’m glad you’re with me jense” he said  
“Don’t know how you’d survive without me”


	2. i am not sleeping alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenson and Sebastian find the house and a letter within

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you like this chapter sorry for the amount of discriptions and any english errors please do comment xx

The fog seemed to cling to every inch of the world. It curled around the branches of the bald weeping willow and danced around the reaches of the yew tree, skittering across the ground before the carriage as if it were fleeing before them.  
Frost clung to the blades of grass and coated the rusted iron gates in front of them. Even from within the carriage Sebastian could feel the icy grip of winter as his breath came in wisps and smokes trailing through the air in front of him.  
“Do you think this is the place” he said turning to Jenson his words seemed muffled in the dusk like day.  
The solemn air that seemed to settle itself over this small part of the world seeping into Sebastian’s veins and making him feel like it would do him good to keep his voice as quite as possible. He felt rather uncomfortable, the way one feels when someone is watching him. The small hairs on the back of his neck pricking up the way such does to warn that all is not well.  
Jenson shrugged “it must be, we followed the directions given to us by that man at the inn to the letter” he glanced out of the carriage to look at the rusted iron gates, coated with the evidence of a northern winter. “Besides if these gates are anything to go by this house is not in very much use at all”  
Jenson jumped down from the carriage to open the gates. The seemed from Sebastian place in the carriage to be offering no small amount of resistance, it was clear that no one had come this way for a very long time. Sebastian worried that if this was the state of just the gates on the outskirts of the property just what would it be like once they got in there. He had horrific images of spider webs coating doorways and rats running free throughout the higher levels of the attics.  
Jenson managed to pull open the gates with one mighty tug running back toward the carriage rubbing his hands together. “Dammit it’s fucking cold. I told you I hated the north”  
Jenson urged the horse to get moving again, the beast, named Alfred, seemed all too eager to, clearly Jenson was not the only one who had a disparaging opinion to the weather here.  
The track beyond the gates was not nearly so well kept as it had been on the other side; the road had not been cleared in what looked like 10 years. Weeds where growing out from the gaps between the paving stones, some so high in places that it was hard to tell what was road and what was simply part of the; equally unkempt; fields around it.  
“You know” Jenson murmured “I think this guy may have exaggerated about this house not being in very much use” he glanced around taking in the wild look of what, presumably once, where show lawns, flat and easy for walking on: now wild and untamed and as part of the Derbyshire wilderness as anything else. If they hadn’t have just come through a set of gates and where not surrounded by fencing, Jenson would have presumed they were out amongst the moors.  
The two men came at last to the top of the drive way, the house coming into view a last over the cusp of the hill. Dark turrets being the first to poke their heads out over the brow of the rise, dark stone leaping up from the greying grass, rising up to meet them. The house was equally foreboding in nature, a dark wooden door bolted shut and masonry like coal. The windows, with panels stuck upon them would have shrouded the inner workings of the house with as much darkness as the house itself seemed to cast over the land.  
Sebastian supposed had they not arrived under such bleak conditions it may have been a different story but as it was he found himself feeling father frightened by the prospect before him. “You know” he muttered turning to his friend who looked as shocked as he was by what stood before them “I am not all that sure that I want to go in”  
Jenson shook his head “well neither am I but we came all this way so we may as well take a look, even if we then decide it will be more beneficial to our health to sleep in the carriage instead.”  
Sebastian nodded putting one reluctant hand on the door pushing it open and jumping down from the trap. Jenson followed him his boots crunching on the sparse gravel beneath. Sebastian pulled a the key out from his pocket leading the way up towards the house looking far more brave than he felt, Jenson followed him, his feet dragging along, he was not at all convinced that this was a good idea, something felt very off about this place indeed.  
Sebastian placed the key in the door jiggling it around a little to get it to fit, he had panicked for a moment then thinking that perhaps they had been sent the wrong key. But after a few moments of work the key slid into the lock and turned, Sebastian had to push away the ivy the coated the side of the door to get at its handle, twisting it and dislodging more of the overgrown weed in the process.  
Together Jenson and he pushed at the heavy door to get it to open, it was no easy feet and the door gave an almighty creek as it was finally heaved open by the two men. Jenson took the lead this time, stepping into the foyer of the house followed by Seb.  
Sebastian gasped it was beautiful in a haunting way. True to the outside of the house it looked unused and desolate, the deep smell of must and mildew filled the air with a putrid sweetness making Sebastian gag.  
“Maybe we leave the door open” he suggested to his friend who nodded in agreement.  
A thick layer of dust seemed to cover all of the visible surfaces and the wooden floor beneath their feet was thick with the stuff. Sebastian looked up his eyes following the winding staircase; a faded red carpet covered the stairs, bleached a pinker shade where stray rays of sunlight had reached it. Hung from the ceiling was a beautiful chandelier, or what once would have been a beautiful chandelier. Now it was coated with the same amount of dust as the rest of the foyer, stray cobwebs hung from it, some attached to the light itself and some hung from it in long trellis like tendrils, though they were all blessedly spider free, at least for the moment anyway.  
“wow” said Jenson breaking the eerie silence that seemed to settle of the house, “no one has been here in a very long time I think”  
Sebastian nodded though it rather felt as if that was stating the obvious. He walked further into the house he stepped into what he assumed it was a drawing room, stacked on a faded coach was a pile of books. If it weren’t so covered with dust he would have expected someone to walk through the doors. The house still looked half lived in like the owners had just walked out one day and left it. But it felt sad it felt like a story half finished. He left that room, and Jenson stood in it, heading up the winding staircase scattered about the steps were novels an edition of great expectations lay open on the top step a corner folded over to mark the readers place. The inhabitants of this house had clearly loved books he thought.  
He pushed open the first door he came to the room was drafty, a pane of the window had broken letting in a drizzle of rain that had begun to stain the floor. The curtains once a lush dark velvet and become moth eaten and ragged there was something so unrelentingly sad about this house something so lost.  
He turned leaving the room with the broken window just as the orange light of sunset began to stream through the cracked pane. Catching the edge it refracted around the corner streaming into a million different colours that danced across the door and followed Sebastian back down the stairs to the drawing room where Jenson was calling his name.  
Stood in the middle of the dilapidated drawing room was Jenson. In his hand was held a note which he passed to Sebastian, he then began to clean room of the books of the coach so that they may sit down, he grimaced a little at the mouldy tea cups sat upon the coffee table, moving those as far away from him as the space inside the room would allow. Sebastian glanced down at the letter. It was written in the same elegant script as the letter he had received some days prior and written on the same high quality paper as well, such Sebastian surmised that it must be from the aristocrat that had contacted him about this place.  
Dear Mr Vettel  
I hope that your journey was not too arduous and that you made it here in good time. I must apologize for the state of the house, as I spoke of before it has been many a year since this place has been lived in, though I suspect that facing the extent of its dilapidation came as a bit of a shock.  
You may clear this place up as you see fit and further furnish it if you so desire, though I ask, pray do not allow strangers into my home.  
** Sebastian snorted a little at that where he and Jenson not strangers?**  
I allow some irony for such a statement  
** Sebastian laughed, at least the sender saw the flaw in his logic and allowed some humor**  
But please, other than yourself I would wish for no others to enter my house, furnish it as you will but do so with the aid of only your servant. I have prepared two rooms for you, they are clean (if a little dusty), I hope you settle in well.  
Regards

Again the letter was unsigned and Sebastian wondered if he would ever find out whose house in which he now currently resided.  
“Rather strange isn’t it” said his friend who had been peering over his shoulder in order to read the letter as well.  
Sebastian nodded, indeed it was. Stranger more so, that this landlord had allowed Sebastian and Jenson to live here; men he had, presumably never laid eyes on; but had such stipulations about people he did not know in his house.  
“I don’t pretend to understand it” Sebastian said “but at least we have a roof over our heads, and once we’ve been able to clean this place up it shouldn’t be too bad. Even if we have to do it all ourselves”  
Jenson raised his eyebrows “you intend to follow this crazy guys demand” he asked  
Sebastian nodded “we are living in his house jense, would not do to annoy him further, eccentric this man may be, but he has given us somewhere to live and I don’t intend to annoy him so much that he demands we leave. We as you well know, have no choice”  
Jenson sighed “I suppose so, but if we find the spider that made that web on the chandelier, I am leaving, because judging by the extent of that web, the creature must be the size of a dinner plate.”  
Sebastian nodded he at least could concede that, he himself would rather sleep on the lawn than share a house with that beast. He set the letter down upon the coffee table, it settled on the layer of dust standing out against it.  
“I suppose we had better go and find these rooms, it’s getting rather late” he said leading the way out of the room and up the stairs.  
“ok,” Jenson muttered “but we are sharing, I am not sleeping alone in a haunted house.”


	3. residing with rodents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenson and sebastain get to work cleaning the house and seb spots a specture

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> moooore gothic melodrama, please like and comment  
> sorry for any english errors  
> Tbh debating taking this down its kinda shit

“well” Jenson said “you were right about something, it doesn’t look the same in the light of day….I didn’t think it was possible but it actually looks worse.”  
Sebastian grimaced he supposed that his friend wasn’t wrong; it did look pretty damn terrible. The panelling on the windows shrouded many of the rooms in darkness; Jenson had stated however that this was probably for the better. He thought that there was probably black mould growing on almost all of the walls and the less seen of such the better. Sebastian was just grateful however that they had no found the maker of the spiders web in the hall way.  
Sebastian tried to smile, but it felt rather unnatural and he was sure that it looked forced “we’ll just have to get started on cleaning this place up, I’m sure it won’t be so bad once we’ve put some effort into it.”  
Jenson snorted “not likely” he said.  
Sebastian sighed “I don’t have a choice ok, I have to make this work but you could go if you want to I’m sure with your skills you will be able to find new employment wherever you should want it”  
Jenson smiled slinging an arm around his friend “stop being silly, and I’m staying I’m not letting you stay in Dracula's castle alone my friend, now I’m going to get some water to boil so we can get busy on scrubbing down these walls.” He frowned “if this place even has water” he added as an afterthought leaving the drawing room in search of the kitchens.  
Sebastian went out into the hall way looking for the servant’s stairs and perhaps a supply closet that housed the cleaning utensils. He was not wrong, he thought, this place would look grand indeed when some care was given to it. He could see more clearly now that the house was not quite so dark that the hallway was covered in beautiful wooden panelling, a deep russet colour. Grand indeed, this place would have once been beautiful indeed he thought to himself.  
The panels on the windows would have to come down though, whatever Jenson said Sebastian liked to see where he was going. The act of finding the servants stairway was made far more difficult seeing as most of even the main foyer was shrouded in darkness still.  
He decided instead to run his fingers over the panelling in the hopes that he may be able to find an inconsistency in the set of the wood or maybe a handle that was hidden carefully within the woodwork, after all servants staircases where often hard to find, especially in grand houses like this. The families owning them often desired there help to be seen but not heard, leading to mazes of secret passage way and stairwells to be designed within.Just as Sebastian was about to give up the tips of his fingers skimmed over a gap in the wood, his index finger catching on what he thought was a hinge.  
“a-ha” he yelled in triumph  
He placed both hands on the wall feeling around for the handle that would presumably open the way to a servant’s area. After a few minutes of fruitless searching he found another dip in the wood and a handle concealed within. He pulled at it, first this way and then that, trying in every possible way to manoeuvre the door open. Nothing. The door appeared to be locked, but who would bother locking door in what appeared to be a long abandoned house, it was unusual to say the least, but then again what about this situation wasn’t. Maybe it was simply a supply closet that had fell out of used before the previous owners had left and they had opted to simply close it up instead of attempting to put it to a different use.  
“Sebastian?!, Sebby, where are you” Jenson was calling him from the direction of the drawing room.  
Sebastian turned, forgetting about his search for a supply closet, he hoped that Jenson had experienced better luck in his search for the kitchens. He dismissed the finding of the door as nothing more than mildly strange and went in search of his friend, thinking no more about his unexpected find.  
“Here” he said poking his head back into the day room “ just went exploring”  
Jenson grinned “find anything interesting?”  
Sebastian shrugged not entirely sure how to answer the question in such a wat that would make the house seem any weirder than Jenson already thought it was. Despite Sebastian’s protestations he really did not want to be left here alone, just for starters getting this place fixed up by himself would be almost impossible and though he had not mentioned as such to his friend the house gave him the same uneasy feel that the other man had mentioned the night before.  
“Well” continued Jenson not seeming to notice his friends unease “I found both the kitchens and the servants cleaning closet, the kitchens by the way stink I wouldn’t go searching for them if I where you.” Jenson screwed up his noise at the memory “it’s like something died in there.”  
“Rats probably” pointed out Sebastian  
Jenson shuddered “please don’t say rats again the thought of rooming with rodents makes me want to leave the county”  
Sebastian laughed “I thought we could take down the boards on the windows, try and make this place look a little less like Dracula’s castle as you so charmingly dubbed it.”  
Jenson nodded and the pair went about cleaning the place.

****  
5 hours later Jenson collapsed on the sofa no longer caring that it wasn’t exactly the cleanest thing in the world.  
“I’m starving” he announced placing his hand on his stomach for dramatic effect.  
Sebastian’s own stomach choice that moment to make it own presence known, Sebastian laughed “ so apparently am I” he stated “I’ll go down to the village, try and get us some food. I have £2 that should get us some essentials. You find somewhere to store them, somewhere” he added, “that doesn’t smell like a mortuary.”  
Jenson’s laughs followed him out from the house and into the foyer. He grabbed his coat of the banister which he had hung it last night and stepped out into the frigid winter air. The gravel crunched beneath his feet as he made his way up the driveway, he however did not make it very far, Something stopped him.  
He thought at first that it was merely the wind on his skin that was making the small hairs on the back of his neck stand to attention and fell like someone was sliding their icy hands down his back, making his spine tingle. But no, there it was again, the feeling that he was being watched. He turned slowly, by Jenson, please just let it be by Jenson, he muttered to himself.  
He glanced toward the window where he thought the drawing room was, where the first and only, boards had been taking down. No one was there. He glanced then toward the door, the only other logical place for someone to be stood watching him. As far as he knew every other window in the house had been boarded up, no one would be able to watch him from them. Jenson he reminded himself, Jenson would not be able to watch him.  
The door way however was empty. Oh god, Sebastian thought, this was far to wuthering heights for his taste. He was about to turn away, call bullshit on his instincts. It was entirely possible that the new place had simply brought on a latent paranoia, when he noticed a section of the house that was not boarded up like the rest. He would not have been able to see this the night before, due to the oppressive darkness, but there was a section of the house that did not have the heavy wooden panels on its windows. Well not a section he supposed but two windows, perhaps part of a small apparmented area. He thought; no he must be mistaken; but he thought that they were in the exact location within the house that they may be connected to ; what he thought was; the locked staircase.  
Sebastian thought that just for a moment, for the briefest of moments, when his eyes scanned the unsheltered windows that he had seen a silhouette of a man stood at one. His hand against the glass and looking down at Sebastian in the driveway. Sebastian blinked, rubbing his eyes with his fists; surely he had to be mistaken. He looked up again. He was, sure enough there was no one stood at the window, no man watching him from a hidden apartment, just a curtain of some sorts tapping against the window in the languid stale air of the house. Sebastian drew a relieved gulp of air. Sometimes every once in a while it was really rather splendid to be caught mistaken.  
He turned away from the house walking again in the direction of the village chalking up his mistaking of curtain for mysterious men to having had nothing more the 2 house continuous sleep for the last 4 days. He began humming to himself, it was all going to be ok he could feel it.  
***  
The man’s hands where shaking as he flattened against the dry wall. He didn’t think the other man had seen him, stupid he muttered to himself, he should have had the good sense to keep hidden, no matter how curious he had been about the appearance of his new roommate. He drew the curtains tight and ventured down the winding servants stairs to make sure that the door at the bottom had been correctly bolted shut.  
He resolved to stay as hidden as possible, surely this would be little more than a temporary arrangement surely Mr Vettel had friends that would be able to take him in. Sebastian was young, amicable and attractive, he doubted the man was friendless of without those that may be able to provide a more suitable home. He hoped this was the case at least, after all he could not after all keep this up for very much longer. Mr Vettel; if he was not very much mistaken; was an exceedingly clever man, if a little trusting, who the hell moved into the home of someone they had never met, without so much as a by your leave.  
The man suspected however that Sebastian would sooner or later wonder why this wing of the house was closed off and locked without any real reason. He found himself shaking gain, Sebastian would find him, like a phantom or a ghost hidden amongst the rafters and cobwebs of a decayed house. He would be lucky indeed if Sebastian did not; upon his discovery; decide to have him admitted to an asylum, or a zoo. Jesus this had been the monument of bad decisions, why in god’s name had he allowed himself to be persuaded to think that this way anything other than a mistake.  
The man sat down heavily in his faded arm chair and tried to forget just how devastatingly handsome the young man had been. It would do him no good to dwell on such things; he could not very well introduce himself now could he. He’d, in the best possible circumstances; probably give Mr Vettel a heart attack. He decided it would be better not to have a fire lit tonight or for the rest of the duration of Mr Vettle’s stay, it would do no good to draw any more attention to his set of rooms than he already had. He resigned himself to a few months of near on freezing to death.  
He glanced back over his shoulder to make sure the curtains where drawn as tightly as the could be, picking up his book, he spent the rest of the afternoon pretending he had never set eyes on what was quite possible the most attractive man of his acquaintance. Not of course that there was much competition in that area.


	4. there was no one there

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sebastian descovers the history of the house and someone enters his bedroom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry for the delay ive been so busy with work that ive had no time to wrire as always please leave a comment and some love

Sebastian was attempting to balance 5 boxes of supplies for the house in his arms and was doing a rather bad job of it. The boxes where heavy and so far he had only managed to go 4 steps before dropping something.  
“dammit” he cursed having dropped the box with the bread in it for the fourth time. He’d be lucky if he managed to get any of this back to the house without it being irreparably damaged.  
“hey”  
Sebastian turned around running up the street from the bakery was the blonde who had served him the bread earlier that same day. She was clutching a coat in her hand and a large basket in the other.  
She smiled at him holding out her hand to introduce herself “I’m Susie, I work in the bakery up the road. We met earlier today.”  
Sebastian smiled taking her hand “I’m Sebastian Vettel” the act of taking the young woman’s hand proved to be rather disastrous. Sebastian dropped not one but two boxes onto the ground. He however this time; in the presence of a lady, gently bred or not; managed to prevent himself from cursing.  
Susie gasped “oh lord, I’m sorry. Here let me help you with those, where are you staying”  
Sebastian handed Susie two of the lighter boxes and continued to carry the heavier of the load himself. “Ravenswick house, it’s up by the….”  
Susie’s eyes went wide “I know where it is, everyone knows where it is. Lord you are a braver man than I’ve ever met if you are really living there. I had no idea it was up for lease. I assumed… well I assumed that whoever had the misfortune to be managing that estate would have simply artfully forgotten it. It’s well… it’s.” Susie gulped suddenly seeming to realise who she was talking to “no I should not, I won’t speak ill of the place, if your living there sir.”  
Sebastian was utterly perplexed Susie seemed a sensible sort of girl, but none of what she had said in the last five minutes made even a bolt of sense. “Susie what on earth are you talking about.”  
Susie had stopped dead in her tracks not seeming inclined to help Sebastian any more if he was heading in the direction of Ravenswick House. “Well…no one has lived there for years”  
Sebastian raised his eyebrows at that, that was hardly news to him, he had drawn that conclusion after having spent a mere 5 minutes in the house. He rolled his eyes at the girl “yes and…. A few cobwebs haven’t gotten you scared have they” for Susie did indeed look terribly frightened. Her eyes were as round saucers and her fair skin had taken on an even whiter pallor that it had before.  
Susie huffed a little at that, clearly not liking having her character question by a man she scarce knew. “No indeed sir. It’s just something dreadful happened there. Used to be a beautiful house it did, till the little boy died.”  
Sebastian’s eyes blew wide; he had known nothing of this. No wonder the house had been abandoned by its owner, no wonder it felt so lonely. “What?”  
“Lord and Lady Raikkonen, their little boy Robin. Nought but 10 years old, sweet child, everyone loved him and none more so than his lordship. The little lad was carried away by a fever they say, on midsummer’s eve. Her ladyship went mad with grief, wouldn’t eat nor drink. My ma used to work at the house; she said her ladyship started seeing thing that weren’t there too. She passed away but 2 months after the lad “  
Sebastian was horrified “how did she die”  
Susie shrugged “I don’t rightly know and I shall not besmirch her ladyship’s reputation by telling you all the rumours though you’re likely to hear them one way or another. All I know was there was a great fire that destroyed a whole wing of the house; the manor used to be double the size it is now; her ladyship was declared dead the next day.”  
Sebastian’s eyes had filled with tears he was no longer certain he wanted to live in the house; actually he was rather convinced that he emphatically did not. “What happened to his lordship?”  
“His lordship, he knocked down that wing of the house, had it done almost overnight he did. The next week he fired everyone who worked up there; Barring Mr Lauda, his valet; and shut the house up. No one knows where he went or even if he’s still alive. We assume he died in the house along with his wife, no one knows for sure though, people reckon he offed himself. Who knows though really. But the land is still cared for and its people too, so he must be somewhere or he must have given orders to someone. See those who worked up and the house are still taken care of, my ma still has a good living; his lordships estate sends her money each month. So generous that I hardly need work”  
Sebastian’s eyebrows rose, that was most unusual such was hardly custom, the Riakkonen’s must have been an exceptional family. “All of this is very sad I am sure but Susie this does not explain why you are so clearly frightened to go up there.”  
Susie blushed a little at that not liking having been caught out by Sebastian “well” she said looking down at her shoes her face not losing its embarrassed expression “well sir, they say the house is haunted”  
Sebastian snorted, that was ridiculous. But then again had he not thought the very same thing when he had seen, or thought he had seen, a man stood at the window upstairs. “What do people think that they see there” he asked hoping that Susie would describe something completely the opposite to what he himself had experienced.  
“Well” Susie said sounding grateful that Sebastian had not started laughing and called her a simpleton “no one sees her ladyship nor the little lad, though you would have thought that they might. They see his lordship. People are curious you see, kids mostly, boys from the village and the like.”  
Sebastian frowned not liking where this was going “where do they see him?”  
Susie gave him an odd look, like she was assessing whether or not he was teasing her “well sir they sees him in the top windows, the only ones that aren’t boarded up, oddly enough. They sees him stood at the window, looking out over the front driveway. And some times in the dead of winter people sometimes even thinks they see smoke coming from the chimneys”  
Sebastian swallowed, his stomach had turned to led, as it turned out Jenson had been more right about the house than he now cared to admit. “Have you ever seen anything” he asked the young woman.  
She shook her head “no sir, see I have the good sense not to go up there, I’ll help you carry these boxes to the gates but I will go no further.”  
Sebastian nodded and together they made their way up towards the house on the hill though Sebastian wanted, at that moment, nothing more than to be going in the opposite direction. 

***  
Jenson looked up from his spot on the sofa where he had been napping. “oooh, you’re back what did you get” he said taking in Sebastian shell shocked look, he raised his eyebrows. “Scared by the looks of it. Did one of the villagers tell you we were living in a murder house or something.”  
Sebastian blanched “something like that” he muttered and began to relate the events of the morning to a rather ; oddly enough; amused Jenson.  
When Sebastian had finished Jenson began to laugh “oh come on seb you know better than that. It’s just a bunch of rubbish. Just bored country people making up old wives tales to keep themselves occupied, after all it doesn’t seem like there’s an awful lot to do around here. Sure some horrible stuff happened up here, but you are a sensible man Sebastian there is no such things as ghosts. No doubt the lady went mad, and his lordship probably boarded up the house in haste, probably wanting to get away as soon as he could. I expect he simply forgot about that section of the house because it was in such low use, and wanting to leave the place where he lost so much, he didn’t give much thought to it.”  
Sebastian nodded it made sense, Jenson was probably right. The man would joke about ghost and phantoms all day but when it came down to it Jenson was an eminently practical man.  
Jenson smiled indulgently at the younger man “come on let go put this stuff away I cleaned out the kitchen and found a parlour for the food so it won’t go off, now here’s hoping that we can work out how to get the stove to work”  
***  
As it turned out they could not. Either the stove was far too old or they simply; neither of them; had the relevant training in said area.  
Jenson groaned looking down at their plane dinner of cold cuts and bread “don’t you wish that the owner of this dump would let us hire staff”  
Sebastian shrugged, looking remarkably unconcerned by his fare, for a member of the nobility Sebastian was remarkably adaptable and easy going, a reason why Jenson liked him so much. “Not like I could afford them anyway. I am sure we can learn, we will just have to make things up as we go along a little.”  
Jenson smiled “I admire your optimism” he muttered looking back down at his dinner not feeling quite so content as Sebastian.  
***  
After a fair bit of wondering round the house with the pretence of exploring Sebastian had found a room he liked far better than the one he currently occupied. He hoped that the owner of the house would not be too offended that he had decided to occupy a different bedchamber.  
This one however was far larger with an exquisitely comfortable bed and a beautiful view out over the countryside and toward the rolling hilltops. Sebastian loved it and with the help of Jenson moved into the bedchamber that very same night. From his window he could see out over the driveway and toward the village. He sighed; he had no idea how he was going to make this work, in a house such as this. The sadness that seemed to settle itself over each nook and cranny of the manor made sense now, and no wonder Lord Raikkonen had moved away. He would have too, heck if he had somewhere else to go he would have packed his own bags that very same night; but as it was Sebastian had little choice but to make this work. He hoped that Lord Raikkonen was alive and well somewhere, and that his live had not been blighted by the past, though he rather though how on earth could it not be.  
Sebastian exhausted by the day fell asleep in the chaise lounge facing the window, from this door he was almost completely hidden from sight.

Sebastian woke with a start, stopping himself at the very last moment from bolting up from the chair. Someone had just entered the room, and from the footfall he could emphatically tell that it was not his friend. The steps where far too heavy, they were the gait of a much taller and broader man than Jenson was. Jenson stepped like a woman; a fact that he had not enjoyed Sebastian pointing out; but so light that one could barely tell that he had entered a room. This man was quite the contrary, his steps where heavy and there could be no doubt that he had arrived into the area. Sebastian slid down further into the chair hoping that he could remain hidden from what he assumed was a home invader, at best, or some kind of apparition, at worst.  
Sebastian hoped that whatever it was, it would pass by this room assuming that no one was in it. He remembered however that he had left his coat discarded on the floor; whoever was there would no doubt assume that this room was not as unoccupied as it appeared. Then the blood in Sebastian’s veins turned to ice. He had bolted the door from the inside; there was no way for it to have opened as it had. Sebastian unable to bare it any longer sprang from his chair to face whatever it was that no doubt wanted to kill him.  
The room was empty.


	5. why can't i look at you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sebastain gets into Kimi's room and Kimi is not best pleased

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i may not be able to post again this week sorry :( i do hope you enjoy this chapter though i hope i didnt disapoint with Kimi and seb meeting for the first time. please leave comments and kudos

It was 3 o’clock in the morning and Niki was trying to make his way through the house as silently as possible but with the amount he was carrying in his arms, that was almost impossible. When his Lordship had informed him of the imminent arrival of the young Mr Vettel he had not been amused, their secretive existence in the house wasn’t exactly easy with no one else living in the manor, it had now been made almost impossible. Niki wondered what on earth had gone through his Lordships head when he had come up with this hare-brained scheme.  
Niki ran his hand over the wood in order to find the hidden door knob in the wall, he hadn’t light a candle, and he dared not. He just hoped that Mr Vettel and his friend were as sound asleep as they seemed. Niki pulled open the door kicking it softly shut behind him as he made his way up the stairs. He suspected that Kimi would still be awake, the man didn’t sleep nearly enough and seemed to refuse to take good care of himself. As Niki went further and further up the stairs the chill of the air seemed to become more prominent, it was clear that Kimi was still refusing to light a fire in his rooms in case Sebastian might see it.  
His breath fogged up the air in front of him and misted his glasses, yes, he thought to himself this had been a singerly bad idea, for one thing there was no way that this was good for either his or Kimi’s health.  
Sure enough Kimi was still awake, or at least had not taken himself to bed. He was sprawled out over the coach with one arm flung over his eyes hiding the majority of his face from view, so Niki really could not tell either way. Well, Niki huffed if he was going to be made to be awake at such ridiculous hours of the day the Kimi was going to also. He went over to the sofa poking Kimi in his side until the younger man let out a rather irritated huff, Niki smiled a little at that as it turned out Kimi had been asleep.  
Kimi moved his arm but a fraction of an inch so he was able to glare at Niki over the limb. Icy eyes met Niki’s filled with ire and irritation. Niki was not fazed in the slightest, he had known Kimi since he was a young boy he was no longer bothered by Kimi’s mood even in the slightest.  
Niki smiled back “I have food, don’t you growl at me, you’re lucky I don’t make you go and get this lot at 3 o’clock in the morning Mr”  
Kimi rolled his eyes and plucked an orange of the top of one of the boxes and began to eat it not justifying Niki’s statement with an answer.  
Niki smacked his hand away " leave that alone thats my food your stuffs underneeth" Kimi grunted Niki no longer phased by monosyllabic conversation laughed a little at that “you are terrible company.”  
Kimi shrugged clearly he couldn’t care less. Niki stood making his way over to the small parlour he had set up in what he assumed was once a dressing room and began putting away the nights haul of food. When he came back Kimi had already fallen back to sleep on the coach. Niki decided to leave him there it would serve Kimi and his temper right if he had back pain in the morning from sleeping on the coach. Niki, Niki however was going to find himself a bed and maybe just to serve Kimi right for making him wander around in freezing mud at 3am, he’d steal the blanket of Kimi’s bed as well. He refused to freeze to death just because Kimi was obsessed with remaining secret.  
***  
At this point Sebastian was feeling rather like he should be seriously considering checking himself into a mental institution. He has awoken one hour prior to the sound of footsteps across the room the floor above him. He had assumed at first that if was Jenson wandering around new found part of the house because he could not sleep. So he had gone to check, Jenson was however sound asleep in his bed and there was no way for him to have beaten Sebastian back into his room, Jenson Button just quite frankly did not move that quickly anymore.  
So he had gone back to bed thinking that it must be his mind playing tricks on him again. It was after all a rather big house, a big old house, and such houses where often known for making inexplicable noises in the dead of night. What had Jenson called it? Ah yes, the house settling. That none withstanding it had only been a few days since he had been told of the houses less that savoury past, it was no wonder that he had attached the idea of creepy noises at 2 am to it. That must be it, he had simply heard something scary about the house and his mind was now jumping to the conclusion of ghost every time he heard a small noise.  
He had just about managed to convince himself that it was his mind making things up when the noise came again: the noise of heavy footsteps across bare wooden floors. Sebastian sat up in bed straining to hear what was going on; he was this close to standing on a chair and pressing his ear against the ceiling to see if he could hear anything else. He wondered how long he could convince himself that it was his imagination especially since, if he wasn’t very much mistaken, he could now hear the low buzz of conversation from the room above.  
Then a thought occurred to him. He wondered how he had not realized such a thing before; his room was directly below the string of windows on the floor above that had not been boarded up. This time, Sebastian thought it was all too much of a coincidence. No doubt what he’d find up there would be a bunch of squatters that had made their home in amongst the abandoned building and had yet to make their presence known or evacuate the building. Sebastian slid from the bed pulling on a dressing gown as he did so. He would just have to be brave and go and investigate, but he was stopping by the kitchens to pick up something that resembled a weapon before he went up there. Even if the closest thing to arming himself would be picking up a frying pan, it was better than nothing.  
****  
Sebastian was running his hand over the wood panels searching for the door handle that he had found a few days before; his frying pan was clutched in his other hand. His heart was hammering and he wondered if perhaps he should not have been so brave about this whole thing and just woken Jenson up to accompany him.  
Finally his hand found the dip in the wood and with a few more moments of grappling about in the dark he found the handle. He thought that if was probably still as locked as it had been the day before, maybe the squatters where using another door to get in and out of the rooms, or maybe they climbed in the windows. Never the less it couldn’t hurt to try the door before he was forced to think of other more creative means of entry. He jiggled the door knob for a few moments it was stiff with disuse and Sebastian thought that perhaps it was locked after all. But then something in the door seemed to give way. He pushed it open, wincing a little at the loud creaking noise it seemed to make, apparently there was an art to opening this door. It however did prove his theory that there was someone else in the house. This door had been certainly closed the day before, and as far as Sebastian knew ghosts could not open doors. Squatters it was then, Sebastian was sure if this made matters better or worse. So frying pan in hand he made his way up the stairs to face whatever lurked above. 

Kimi was dozing on the sofa, he was rather uncomfortable but far to exhausted to be bothered to move, and he suspected that the short distance from the sofa to his bed would take up more energy than he currently possessed. Furthermore, if he wasn’t very much mistaken he had heard Niki removing the covers from his bed. That in mind he doubted that he would be anymore comfortable in his bed than he was on the coach, nor any warmer.  
He was about to roll over and attempt to go back to sleep when he froze at the unmistakable sound of the door at the bottom of the stairs creak open and someone making their way towards the apartments above.  
Kimi’s heart skipped a beat and his breath came in short panicked gasps. He slid of the sofa as quickly as his body would allow, leaning over to blow out the candle next to the sofa, he sequestered himself in the darkest part of the room hidden behind the folds of the velvet curtains. It was juvenile at best but there was little else he could do. He could not let Sebastian see him, Sebastian must never see him.  
Sebastian rounded the final corner of the spiral staircase and came to face a large wooden door not unlike the one at the bottom of the stairs. He felt around in the dark for the handle. It was more difficult this time. With the door at the bottom he had been aided at least by the light of the moon the filtered in through the wide windows near foyer. He did though eventually find it pulling it in the same manner as he had done to the one at the other end he managed to get it open. He yanked the wooden door towards him, and peered into the darkened room. The room looked empty, and like it had been so for a long time. He stepped in his footsteps echoing on the ground beneath him.  
“Hello?” he called out not really expecting anyone to answer him and of course his expectations were met.  
He stepped further into the darkness making his way over to the coach in the middle of the room facing what looked like a servants fire place; Small but functional, perhaps then these where the rooms of a former governess. As Sebastian made his way over toward the sofa his eyes skimmed over a small candle placed on the coffee stand beside the seat, the wax in it was still melted, he ran his fingers over it, still warm, perhaps this room was not so empty as it appeared. Sebastian clutched his frying pan tighter.  
“Hello? Please is anyone there, my name is Sebastian vettel.” His breath came in harsh little pants “I understand that you may be squatters, I have no want to throw you out, I know how hard it can be to have found yourself without a home and with nowhere to go. I would…. I would just like to be assured that I’m not going crazy. Just show yourself….. I don’t mind if you stay here, I don’t mind at all”  
The hairs on the back of Sebastian’s neck stood to attention. There was someone stood behind him, he was sure of it. He raised his frying pan about to spin around and clock whoever it was over the head and call the local constable when an unfamiliar voice rung out from the shadows of the room.  
“do not turn around.” The voice was that of a mans, monotone and rough with disuse.  
“what?” chocked Sebastian “who are you”  
“Close your eyes Sebastian”  
Sebastian chocked “I don’t understand, why, who are you. Are you a squatter, a criminal? Are you going to kill me?”  
The man came closer and Sebastian didn’t dare turn around to face whoever it was, but if he wasn’t very much mistaken this was the same man who had been in his room the night before. He screwed his eyes up tight in fear, whoever this man was it was clear he was completely mad.  
“good” the man said “keeps your eyes closed and I will lead you out of this room, you will forget you ever found this place” The man’s hands gripped Sebastian’s shoulders spinning him and all but pushing him out of the room.  
“Why can’t I look at you” asked Sebastian maybe the man was some kind of criminal and he thought if Sebastian saw him he’d send the cops in thick and fast.  
The man didn’t answer shoving Sebastian out of the room; the door was slammed shut behind him.


	6. increasing social circle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi and seb send notes to each other like school children

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well i lied about updates huh?

Sebastian was confused by the events of last night to say the least. He had awoken to find himself alone in the house, Jenson having left a note saying that he had gone out for a walk as the stale air of the house was doing his poor lungs no favours. Sebastian had rolled his eyes a little, to say that Jenson was found of dramatics would be putting it lightly. Still it gave him more time to go over what on earth had happened last night. He still couldn’t quite believe it, a man hidden away within the dusty corners of the house, hiding, and all the while Jenson and Sebastian living a few rooms below. The whole scenario beggared belief, such things quite simply did not happen in real life they should be reserved to occupy the pages of lurid gothic novels, not the lives of boring men like Sebastian.  
Sebastian couldn’t stop thinking about the man, who the hell was he and what was he doing here; but more importantly why did he sound so frightened when he had spoken to Sebastian. The more he thought about it the more Sebastian recognized the man’s actions as ones of fear. The whole thing made absolutely no sense: never the less Sebastian couldn’t get the thought out of his head that he had somehow deeply frightened the man, and he felt terrible about it. He took a pen from his bag and pulled a sheet of paper out from within the writing desk in his room, sitting down to pen a small note to the mysterious man upstairs.  
Dear sir (I would address you by your name; and I am aware that this is very rude; but I am afraid that I do not know it)  
I am dreadfully sorry for intruding on you last night. Now I think about it, it must have been awfully shocking to have woken up and have been met with a man you have in your life never seen before: stood in your living room. Allow me to offer my deepest apologies.  
In case you were wondering my name is Sebastian Vettel; it’s nice to meet you I suppose. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone you’re here but, if you would ever like company, I would not object to it. (I know one shouldn’t invite strangers into the bed chambers but I trust you won’t tell anyone and will respect my virtue I am sure). My room is directly below yours I think, Jenson sleeps on the other side of the house so you needn’t worry about him.  
I hope you have recovered from the shock of last night, my apologies again.  
Yours  
Sebastian Vettel.

Sebastian folded the note and briefly debated on whether or not to put it into an envelope. He decided against it, he was after all only going to stick it under another door in the house; propriety could be ignored this one time. Sebastian took the note downstairs to post underneath the mystery man’s door looking around every now and again just to make sure that Jenson wasn’t around; he didn’t want his friend to know what was going on just yet. Sebastian slid the letter under the door wondering if the man was even still there, if he was a squatter he would probably have long gone now; something however told Sebastian that there was far more to this than there first appeared to be.  
***  
Kimi was stood on the other side of the door having gone down to check that the thing was locked for the third time that morning, his paranoia had reached new heights and his knees where not pleased about it. He had gone up and down the staircase 6 times that morning.  
Kimi looked down at the small folded piece of paper at the bottom of his stairs with confusion, why would Sebastian have slipped him a note under his door of all things. What on earth was the boy playing at? Kimi thought that he had made his desire to be left alone more than abundantly clear the last night, but apparently Sebastian had a thicker skull than that. That or he really wanted to tempt fate; one or the other.  
Kimi picked up the note he was admittedly rather curious as to what it said. His eyes skimmed the contents of the note. Sebastian was requesting his company, the man must be insane. Kimi was certain that he had scared the living daylights out of Sebastian, but as it turned out he had not done a very good job of it. He debated telling Niki about the note but no doubt the other man would laugh and say that Kimi was clearly losing his touch. Kimi made his way back up the stairs Sebastian’s note clutched in his hand. Sebastian had apologized to him; he was concerned that he had frightened Kimi.  
Kimi looked down at the note reading it again, trying to make sure that he had not misunderstood it. He had no idea why Sebastian had requested his company; Kimi rather thought that he had invited a truly exceptional man into his home. He wondered not for the first time what on earth he had gotten himself into.  
He folded the note back up and slipped it into his breast pocket a small smile creeping over his face. He would not be able to take Sebastian up on his offer; at least not in the conventional sense; but never the less it was an oddly nice feeling, being thought of by Mr Vettel. He leaned back against the sofa letting the exhaustion of the morning anxiety sweep over him as his fell into a fitful sleep.  
***  
Sebastian was trying to stay awake; he didn’t want to fall asleep in case the man from upstairs came to see him. Sebastian looked at the clock, though at 4 am that seemed to be growing more and more unlikely. Perhaps then man had already gone. Sebastian leaned his face against the cold window pane in an attempt to wake himself up a little but the fight was already lost, his eyes slid closed as the door to his bedroom slid open.  
Kimi had waited until he was absolutely sure that Sebastian was asleep. It had taken far longer than he had expected as it turned out the man had remarkable resistance, Kimi himself was more than ready to fall asleep in the alcove he had hidden himself in, and he was more than used to going days with barely any sleep at all.  
He poked his head into the room, making sure to keep to the darkest parts of it, just in case Sebastian woke up, he would be able to hide himself quick enough. His gaze rested on Sebastian. His face was pressed up against the cold window glass and he was dressed in nought but a thin white nightshirt, even from across the room Kimi could see the younger man trembling with the cold. Stupid boy Kimi thought to himself.  
He left the note and the small package for Sebastian on the writing desk by the bed retrieving from the four-poster a thick woollen blanket. Then as quietly as his awkward gait would allow he made his slow way over to the sleeping boy by the window, praying that none of his movements awoke Sebastian.  
He paused as he reached the boy. Up close and not quite as consumed with fear as he had been the night before Kimi took the time to appreciate the beauty of the other man. He had beautiful soft curly blonde hair and eyelashes so long that they seemed to sit on his cheeks, Kimi was not sure but he thought that Seb’s eyes where a pale blue. Kimi froze when Sebastian shifted a little in his sleep, he did not however awaken, it appeared that once Mr Vettel was asleep there was precious little that could be done to change that.  
Kimi folded the thick blanket before laying it over the sleeping form.  
“Sweet dreams Seb” he murmured as he slipped out of the room.  
***  
Sebastian woke slowly. He was cold and stiff all over and his neck hurt like hell. He glanced over at the large clock on the mantel piece 7 in the morning, he groaned. He was usually an early riser but waiting for the mystery man’s possible appearance for the majority of the night had taken it straight out of him. He stretched again, and a blanket fell from his lap pooling onto the floor; that was odd he thought to himself; he did not remember getting up to fetch a blanket last night. Maybe Jenson had gotten it for him. Jenson was prone to awakening well before 6 it was entirely plausible that he had found Sebastian asleep by the window and covered him with a duvet before going to get breakfast. Sebastian reached down for the coverlet wrapping it around himself to starve of the cold as he went in search of something to wear.  
As he stood he noticed there was a letter laying on top of the writing desk, he was sure THAT had not been there before and it was far too early for the mail to have arrived. Sebastian picked it up, it was not as he had first thought an ordinary letter but what appeared to be a small package. Sebastian slid his finger under the flap of the envelope tearing it messily open. He shook it to get at the contents within.  
First fell from the envelope was a small folded letter, as to be expected, but then much to Sebastian’s bemusement there fell also what looked like a blindfold. What on earth. Sebastian picked up the small letter, hoping that it would offer some explanation as to the contents of the rather unusual package. It read only;  
I will visit you tonight 12 on the dot, please wear the mask.  
My name is, you may know me as Matias.  
Yours  
M

Sebastian sighed a little at that he had spent enough time in society as to be rather proficient at reading between the lines of a conversation. He was under no illusion that the name he had been given was a real one, for whatever reason Matias did not want to give Sebastian his real name. At least it was better than just calling him the man in the attic. Sebastian refolded the note and slipped it into the desk draw along with the blindfold safely out of sight of any prying eyes, mainly Jenson’s.  
Sebastian seriously doubted that he would be able to get anything productive done today the anticipation at finally getting to meet the strange man seemed to fill him with an anxious energy. He slipped on instead a heavier coat and went about getting himself ready for one of Jenson’s long walks maybe that would help clear his head and allow him to think of something other than finally getting to meet Matias.

Kimi was watching the young man leave the house from safely behind one of the curtains, unaware that he himself was being watched by a rather disapproving Niki.  
“You went to see him didn’t you” the man said narrowing his eyes at Kimi.  
Kimi turned a cool expression on his face “yes what of it Niki”  
Niki flopped down into Kimi’s usual armchair unperturbed by Kimi’s attitude. “I’m glad that your finally increasing your social circle beyond me and the rodent population to include this young man,” he sighed “all I’m saying is be careful Ok, just take this slowly, be sensible about it Kimi.”  
Kimi nodded he understood his friends concern he really did but he was sure that Sebastian was different; something about the boy seemed trustworthy “I gave him a blindfold to wear I will make sure that he does not see me” he did not add that he had already set eyes on the other man, but as far as he knew Sebastian was still in the dark as to Kimi’s appearance.  
Niki nodded “I don’t think I can dissuade you from this can I, just be careful Kimi”


	7. Matias was gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kimi visits Sebastian and seb grows more curious

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when Kimi is refered to by his name it is in his perspective when he is refered to as Matias it is in Sebs.  
> as always please like and comment i really aprriciate it.  
> ps. i really lied about the updates huh

Sebastian glanced up at the clock 11.57. He took the blindfold from the bedside table and slipped it over his head. He debated leaving a gap under it, which he would be able to peek out off, and maybe get a proper glimpse of what the mysterious man looked like. He however decided against it, he didn’t want Matias to figure out he had done so and decide that he wouldn’t come to see Sebastian again. Sebastian was intrigued by this man and who he really was; if he wasn’t going to get to see what Matias looked like then he would do his damn best to figure out who he really was. Sebastian was a naturally curious person. As a child this had often gotten him into trouble. His mother; eventually had to point out that there where somethings that you quite simply did not do, and going about attempting to find out everyone in the neighbourhoods secrets was one of them.  
Never the less there was something about this man that intrigued Sebastian, he was a mystery begging to be solved and Sebastian found that he quite simply could not help himself. He sat down on the bed waiting anxiously for Matias to arrive; Seb hoped that he had not changed his mind.  
Sebastian froze when he heard the unmistakeable sound of his bedroom door being opened and closed and heavy footsteps makings their slow way toward him. The feeling of being blindfolded while a relative stranger approached him was both terrifying and exhilarating; Sebastian wondered at that surely that was not normal behaviour.  
“Matias?” he called wanted to make sure that the person was in fact the man that he had met the night before. The bed dipped a little the other man had sat down on the end of the bed far from Sebastian’s reach, now he was almost certain that it was Matias something about that behaviour ran very true to the man he had met last night.  
“It’s me” the other man confirmed.  
Sebastian smiled at him in what he hoped was an encouraging way. “Um it’s nice to meet you, again, well meet you properly” he said holding his hand out to where he thought Matias was.  
Matias took his hand shaking it, his hand was gloved, thickly gloved, Sebastian wondered at that. Why was the other man wearing what he thought where gardening gloves inside, it wasn’t even especially cold, and definitely not so in Sebastian’s rooms “it’s nice to meet you too” he responded in his soft monotone voice. Sebastian thought that he could hear a slight accent colouring the other man’s tone, though he couldn’t put his finger on where that accent came from.  
He thought that he would ask, though something about his companion told him that he was a rather secretive man, well he thought it couldn’t hurt to ask “where are you from, Matias” he queried  
There was a pause, and in that pause Sebastian came to register that the other man had yet to realise his hand. Sebastian listened as Matias drew in a large gust of air, it was clear to him now that Matias was wondering whether or not to tell him the truth “Espoo” he said eventually  
“Where is that” Sebastian asked. His knowledge of geography was not terribly good, seeing as his father had removed him from formal schooling when the money had run out, and had also conveniently forgotten to hire a tutor to replace it.  
The other man let out a small huff-like laugh “ it’s in Finland”  
Sebastian gasped in delight “I have always wanted to go to Finland, I’ve heard that it’s beautiful, and the snow. I’ve always wanted to see the snow in Finland” he sighed “I have never really been anywhere or done anything interesting, would you tell me about it”  
He heard Matias nod from the way his hair brushed against the bedpost he was apparently leaning against “of course.”  
Sebastian smiled he loved the sound of Matias’ voice, the way his accent curled around the words. “Tell me about the winters”  
“I am not sure Finland particularly has anything else to your opinion, but I will tell you none the less. The snow starts to fall in November usually, though it depends. It falls and falls and falls, coating the world in an afternoon. And something about snow seems to make the world seem quieter, that is until people begin to throw it at each other. In the evening the yellow moon catches on the trees in the forests, and reflects of the icy ground. There’s nothing like it. When I was a child we lived near a large lake, one half of the village along one side and the other half along the other. We used to light lanterns along the banks and have competitions over who could create the most extravagant Christmas scenes.”  
Sebastian sighed it sounded so beautiful, like something out of a dream “ then why did you come here, I mean how did you end up here.?”  
Again for a long moment it seemed like the older man was not going to answer him, it rather felt like treading on eggshells around Matias, and always being conscious that the next thing he may say would cause Matias to leave and never visit again. “I don’t mean to pry” said Sebastian “I am merely curious as to why you’d leave such a place for this, a cold abandoned house in the middle of the greyest county known to man”  
Matias chuckled a little at that “aye it can be a little dull at that, I came here for a woman.”  
“Oh” said Sebastian feeling for some reason rather disappointed by Matias’ answer.  
Matias not seeming to notice the tone of Sebastian’s reaction continued “we married much to the disapproval of my family, I had money and status you see, and she did not. We decided that it would be better if we left the country and started again” Kimi broke off at that, he realised that he was giving Sebastian far too much real information. He should be reserving this conversation for light introductions and lies or half-truths and he certainly should not be divulging chunks his past to this man.  
“What happened” asked Sebastian  
Matias snatched back his hand apparently realising that Sebastian still had a grip of it. “I do not wish to talk of this anymore”  
Sebastian held up his arms in surrender, “ok, ok we will talk of something else” he frowned beneath the mask that Matias had given him. He was right about this man something seemed off, he mulled the story over in his mind in the silence that followed, perhaps he would after all look into the previous owner of the house a little more after all.  
Kimi meanwhile was cursing his own stupidity; Sebastian was far too clever for his own good. Kimi should not have opened his goddam mouth, he should not have come to see Sebastian and he most certainly should not have begun to tell him his life story. He tried desperately to come up with something to distract the young man from his train of thought “so why are you here, you seem like a well-bred gentleman what brings you to this place.”  
Sebastian smiled a little at that “I think to call me a well-bred gentleman would be to grossly exaggerate the situation, I suppose at one time I may have been considered so. But alas that is no longer the case; I lost my home you see.” Matias made a non-committal noise of sympathy he had of course already known this having been the one to invite the young man here in the first place.  
“My father gambled everything away, down to the last penny. We had nothing; we could not even afford to pay the staff. After my mother died, he lost interest in everything you see; my father is not a bad man, you realise, simply as carless one. He passed away a few months ago. When I inherited I finally saw how bad the situation was. I had been living with friends in Germany for a long time prior, I only returned to England to set his affairs in order and not to mention I had outstayed my welcome on the continent.  
I arrived home to find the house in upheaval and when I consulted a solicitor he informed me that I was left almost destitute, and with no money of my own there was little I could do about it. Then the debt collectors came, they took everything.” He sighed “I am here because I no longer have a home” he felt Matias take his hand back into his as the tears slid down Sebastian’s face soaking the blindfold. “But then, this letter came via the express, someone whom I had never met wanted to give me aid, gave me a home” he smiled “such kindness from someone I had never met it was remarkable”  
Kimi smiled he was happy that he had at least been able to help Sebastian in a small way even if his offer of help was an old house that had almost definitely seen its better days many years prior, he found himself both hoping that Sebastian would stay here and fearing it.  
Sebastian ran his fingers over the gloved hands clasped in his “so you see we are both waifs and strays of the world; neither of us with anywhere to go. I won’t tell anyone of this, of your presence here I promise. I think perhaps you are running from something”  
Indeed this boy was far too clever for his own good; Kimi began to think that he would have to be exceedingly careful about what he said around this young man.  
“But” Sebastian continued “I will not pry into what it is or why, just know that I’ll keep your secret or however much you want to trust me with. We can be lost together”  
The other man let out a little breathy laugh at that “I think I like the sound of that” said Matias.  
“Good” said Sebastian letting out a large yawn  
Kimi glanced toward the large clock on the mantel piece, it was already 4 in the morning. It appeared that they had been conversing for far longer than he had thought, or they simply had been enjoying each other’s company. He sighed, it would be growing light soon, he had to go and by the looks of it Sebastian was about two minutes away from passing out from complete exhaustion.  
“I have to go” he said at last.  
Sebastian tightened his grip on the hand of the other man who laughed a little at that “you will come again, promise me that you will come again”  
Kimi for some reason found himself agreeing “I will be here at the same time tomorrow night” he said.  
Sebastian beamed in the direction that he thought Matias was facing “good, I shall look forward to it.” He said sliding down onto the fluffed up pillows that filled his bed “m’ sleepy” he muttered closing his eyes behind the mask.  
Matias laughed “I can tell” he said the smile evident in his tone “keep your eyes closed Seb in going to take of the blindfold now OK.”  
Sebastian nodded. Matias’ gloved hand slid over his face and ghosted the back of his head lifting it up so that he could undo the bow at the back of Sebastian’s head; he pulled the mask free from Sebastian face, the silk and ribbons of the fine material tickling the sensitive skin of his neck.  
“Eyes tight closed” Matias reminded him  
Sebastian nodded again “same time tomorrow?” he confirmed  
He heard Matias place the mask down on the pillow beside him and felt him shift closer toward Sebastian on the bed, “same time tomorrow” he answered.  
The bed beside Sebastian dipped with the pressure of a large hand supporting the weight of a body. Matias leaned over him, and Sebastian could feel the warm air of Matias’ breath slipping over his face, Sebastian held his breath as Matias placed a light kiss upon his brow.  
Then the weight beside him was replaced by empty air, Matias was gone.


	8. its my fault

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sebastain finds out who matias is

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry for taking so long to updat ive had aa bad case of a chest infection :(

Jenson raised an eyebrow at his friend, “just why do you care so much about the guy who used to live here? What does it matter who this guy is and besides what if you find out something else that you don’t like it took you days to get out of the funk that you got into last time you found out something about the place.”  
Sebastian rolled his eyes “I don’t know ok, I just have this weird hunch about something”  
Jenson fixed him with a steady gaze “do I want to know”  
Sebastian winced a little at that “probably not no”  
Jenson grinned a little at that, “well then” he said with a grin I’m going down to the village then, I met a nice young lad called Danny yesterday, he wants to but me a drink” Jenson waggled his eyebrows suggestively  
Sebastian snorted a little at that if he knew Jenson at all there was no way that it would stop at just a drink. He watched Jenson leaving down the front drive, wondering where on earth he should start. The house still looked very much lived in; or rather it looked as if not much had been changed since the Raikkonen family had lived there. Sebastian ran his hands through his hair; he supposed that the best place to start would be by looking for a study, it was possible that Lord Raikkonen had left everything when he had fled.  
Sebastian left the living room to begin his search for a study, something about this just didn’t seem right, just who was Matias why was he here and why was he so damn cagey about his past. Sebastian wasn’t stupid there was something off here, he knew that the name Matias had given him wasn’t his real name, so maybe it was the name of a friend or a relative, maybe he knew lord Raikkonen. That at least would explain his presence here.  
The thing however that Sebastian was the most curious about was why would Matias not let Sebastian see his face? He had thought the previous night that it was something to do with his identity and him wanting to keep it a secret from Sebastian, but it seemed however to be something more than that. There was a nervous energy to Matias, he had seemed scared by the thought that Sebastian might see him, but he had however, at Sebastian’s insistence told him a little about his childhood and life. It seemed to him that this was not something you would do if you were adamant that nothing about your identity should be known. Sebastian was certain that nothing that Matias had spoken of the previous night had been fabricated, which led then only to the conclusion that he did not want to be seen for another reason. Really this whole thing was enough to make a person’s head swim.  
Sebastian plodded up the stairs toward then second floor. Most of the house still smelled of disuse, Sebastian and Jenson used at best only about a quarter of it, leaving the rest to fester as it willed and there was still something about the house, though neither of the men would have admitted it to the other that made you not want to go wondering around it by yourself.  
He pushed open a heavy door to the left of the stairs leading into a wing of the house that the men preferred not to use, it was damper than the rest of the house and Sebastian suspected it may have been used the most by the Raikkonen family, Sebastian didn't like the feeling that he may well be sleeping with ghosts.  
He breathed in the sickly sweet scent of mildew and looked around the scantily lit corridor, light filtered into the hallway from underneath doorways and flooding in from the opposite end ,through a wide bay window, the curtains of which lay unceremoniously on the floor the satin culminating in a heap beneath the sill. As Sebastian passed them it rather looked like they had been torn down in anger. There were wide gashes in them; Sebastian winced at that, probably best not to let his imagination linger on what on earth could have made those gashes in the fabric.  
Sebastian made his way door the hallway peeking in through the doors and looking swiftly away when he was met only by empty rooms or on occasion a neatly furnished if rather dusty bed chamber. He came to the last door on the corridor, a deep mahogany with a brass doorknob, everything about this door spoke of wealth and affluence, Sebastian rather thought the he had hit the jackpot.  
He pushed open the door; inside was a large desk made of the same wood as the door, with a plush leather seat tucked in neatly behind it, the red of the chair making the room look grand if a little foreboding. He stepped inside, not before looking around the room to make sure that there was no one else in there.  
Something about the room felt of as if it was not in such disuse as the rest of the house, the ghosts of the Raikkonen family for some reason felt fresher here and it gave Sebastian the feeling as if he were not alone.  
He stepped toward the desk, it was odd very odd. Nothing in this room had the same thick layer of dust upon every surface as the rest of the house had when they had first arrived. There where papers out on the desk, papers that should; presuming that the house had been in disuse for a good few years now; have turned yellowed and brittle with age. Sebastian ran his hand over them, there was not so much as a speck of dust on them it was as if they had been laid out here a mere few hours before. It was most unusual.  
Sebastian pulled out the chair sitting carefully in it; he was surprised to find himself half expecting the thing to be warm. It was mercifully not. He opened the draw to his left rifling through a stack of what looked like old estate papers, there unlike the ones on top of the desk where clearly a good few years old and from what he could tell where a mixture of receipts and letters from estate manages.  
He pulled out the one beneath that. The contents of this draw seemed far newer, made up of papers of the same variety from the past few years, after the Raikkonens had supposedly passed on. The letters had clearly been read, he pulled them out. There where accounts of the estates financial situation, from what Sebastian could ascertain information as to the payment of the staff that had worked at the estate. But it was the letter at the bottom of the file drew Sebastian’s attention.  
Lord Raikkonen  
Here is the receipt from the wage payment to your former staff.  
Please contact me we must discuss the estate.  
Signed  
J.Hunt  
The letter much to Sebastian’s surprise had the date stamp of this month, was then Lord Raikkonen still visiting the estate, he must be. At was clear at least that the man was not as dead as everyone assumed him to be.  
Sebastian pulled open the draw at the bottom, now this didn’t look like official papers at all. He placed the file on top of the desk, opening it up. Sebastian frowned it wasn’t a file at all rather an old portrait album. The album was made of a plush velvet that had faded with many a looking through, Sebastian opened it up fighting the urge that he was intruding into the old owners personal life. After all he was living here now didn’t he have the right to know that was going on.  
The photo at the front of the album was of a beautiful dark haired woman clutching a squirming boy in her arms, her head was thrown back in laughter and the boy was grinning mischievously. Underneath was written Lady Raikkonen and Master Robin. Sebastian felt a tear slide down his cheek it seemed crueller than ever that life should have been taken from such a loving and happy family. Poor lord Raikkonen how alone he must be Sebastian though as he turned the page. Here was a miniature of a young man with a soft smile and kind eyes, this picture unlike the other did not have the same well-thumbed look, it seemed almost as if this photo had not been looked at for many a long year. Maybe lord Raikkonen had not cared for it.  
Sebastian could not see why though, the picture looked excellent, or rather the man in the picture looked excellent. He was all broad shoulders and strength but his smile and eyes where so kind. The man seemed to have a quite air about him, a more understated feel than the woman perhaps that was why the Raikkonens had worked so well together.  
The longer that Sebastian looked at the photo the more that he could not shake the feeling that somehow he knew this man, he felt as if he had seen him before, but how could that be surely Sebastian would have remembered meeting someone as remarkable as Lord Raikkonen.  
Sebastian looked down then at the sprawling script below the picture and gasped it read:  
Lord Kimi Matias Raikkonen  
Matias….Matias.  
Sebastian swallowed he didn’t want to jump to conclusions but he rather thought that this mystery had solved itself. Matias was Kimi Raikkonen.  
***  
Niki threw a shoe at Kimi’s head.  
“I would stop whistling if I were you, you are not going to like the should of this”  
Kimi spun round rubbing the back of his head “fucking hell Niki was that really necessary, you know a hey Kimi we need to talk would have been just as effective”  
Nikki snorted “be that as it may, I’m in a bad mood..,”  
“I can tell” quipped Kimi  
Niki shot the other man a bland look “yeah yeah whatever, I just thought that you would want to know. Sebastian Vettel is in your study and I think he is well on the way to putting two and two together”  
Kimi paled, collapsing into the closest chair, “you don’t think that…. You don’t think”  
Niki gave his friend a stern look “I do, he is not a stupid man Kimi and you have not taken the precaution that you should have, those papers should have been up here. And you” he said jabbing a finger towards Kimi “should not have been down there last night, lord knows that you must have aroused this young man suspicions. Just how long do you think you can go on like this? He is going to figure out who you are, and I rather think he has done so already”  
Kimi felt like he was going to pass out Niki was right he should never have allowed Sebastian to move in here and he certainly should not have gone to see the other man last night, he should have listened to Niki he should never have invited Sebastian here he should have left well alone.  
“oh Niki” he sighed “what am I going to do”  
Niki’s gaze softened a little at that “the way I see it lad is you have already made your bed may as well sleep in it now, if Sebastian has figured it all out there is precious little that you can do about it now. It maybe you shouldn’t you have been living alone with no more company than me for too long now” Niki drew a long breath “maybe it is time to step out of the shadows maybe it is time to leave that past where it belongs.”  
Kimi looked up with a lost look in his eyes “how, how can I do that, it’s all my fault. I killed them Niki”


	9. whatever the cost you keep him safe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> something happens to Kimi and Sebastian gets knocked out  
> Kimi’s secrets are piling up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> damn am i getting bad at updating

The moonlight peeked in through the curtains in Sebastian’s room fragmenting around the drapes in rays and bolts illuminating the pale figure hunched up on his bed clutching a blindfold in his hands. The night was cloudy but surprisingly the moon itself had not been hidden behind the clouds that filled the rest of the sky and shone bright in the absence of the rest of the night time illumination.  
Sebastian had no idea what to do, would Matias….Kimi even come tonight. If he did what was Sebastian supposed to do? Should he tell Kimi that he knew who he was or would that scare the man off for good. Sebastian sighed, he was filled once again with the uncomfortable feeling that he was hopelessly and completely out of his depth. This was a feeling that whether he wanted to admit or not he had grown rather accustomed to over the past few weeks.  
Making a decision he slipped the blindfold over his eyes, it was 11.55 a few minutes before Kimi had arrived the night before, Sebastian assumed that he would keep the same schedule tonight. The clock struck 12 and the room remained silent and devoid of another life form. Something about this night felt different from the last and Sebastian had an almost unquenchable desire to drive under his covers and not emerge from them until the night had past.  
From underneath the blindfold the night no longer seemed beautiful, it felt threatening. Over the house had settled an eerie silence that had not been present the night before, nor any night that Sebastian had been here so far. In his very bones something was screaming at him to run, to get out of there a quickly as possible, that something was wrong. He, as best as he could, told it to be quite, he told it that such sensations where better kept within the confines of advantageous literature, but alas it would not listen. Instead the voice seemed to get louder, run it yelled get out of there it screamed.  
Sebastian’s hand went to the blindfold that was wrapped tightly around his head reaching up to untie it he froze. Outside the widow something let out an unearthly cry. Sebastian couldn’t decide if it sounded more like a dog howling or a woman being disembowelled, he was inclined to go with the second. His hand still clasped over the knot tied at the back of his head, he couldn’t seem to bring himself to move. The noise came again and it seemed to be getting closer to the house or more precisely getting closer to his window. Sebastian in a rare fit of bravery pulled the blindfold from his eyes. It slipped from his fingers pooling down onto the bedsheets in his lap, Sebastian strained his ears trying to catch the sound of whatever it was, trying to discern its location before he could summon up the courage to move again.  
The seconds moved like hours but when the noise did not come again for a good 5 minutes Sebastian managed to rally the courage to move again. He swung his feet from underneath the covers and quietly as he could manage, before transferring his full weight onto them and pushing himself off the bed. He made his way over to the window his legs trembling beneath him and his hands shaking by his sides he was careful to keep out of the glare of the moonlight the might show off his form to whatever it was that was prowling the gravel beneath his window. He swallowed hoping very much that he and Jenson had remembered to lock the front doors that evening.  
He crept over to the window, despite knowing rationally that whatever was making the god awful noise was outside, some primal instinct in Sebastian seemed to be telling him to lay low to not making a sound and he was terrified. He reached the window placing one trembling had onto the sill. He drew in a sharp breath lifting up a pale hand to pull back the curtain inch by inch until he could see a sliver of the gravelled driveway and the grass beyond. Nothing. He could see nothing.  
He contemplated pulling back the curtain a little more, but quickly dismissed the idea, he was afraid perhaps irrationally so but he really, really did not want to be seen. His blood turned to ice in his veins when over the whistling of the wind through the glass he heard the sound of heavy footsteps upon the gravel directly below the window, Sebastian dared discovery inching the curtain a further centimetre from the window sill.  
There stood upon the driveway now sill as a statue and staring directly into Sebastian’s window was a huge white wolf it yellow eyes met Sebastian’s through the slit in the drapes and it howled again. Sebastian made a little noise of horror. He had the distinct impression that he had been seen. God let the door be locked Sebastian thought to himself, please let it be locked.  
The wind whistled through the white wolfs hair as it continued to look up at the window, something in its eyes seemed so uncommonly intelligent, and Sebastian was terrified. It felt for some reason as if he were looking at the image below through some kind of hazed fog. It felt like gazing out over a familiar scene when a storm hits; it’s the same place but inexplicably everything feels different and unfamiliar, frightening and more wild.  
Sebastian’s heart was pounding ferociously in his chest, he felt his legs, without warning give way beneath him as he teetered forward he pulled the drapes fully open, slamming into the window pane. His head collided with the metal bar used to open the slots. He cried out in pain before slipping into a fevered and delirious unconsciousness.  
Below the window the white wolf let out a cry and disappeared into the shadow beyond the reaches of the light.

***  
Kimi felt the familiar pain rippling up his arm, how could he have forgotten. Every damn time he allowed himself to get arrogant, or more to the point he allowed himself to forget; that if by some miracle that the curse would just let him go it came back in full force. He grasped his arm in pain stifling a cry of terror against his fist as it clenched beneath his hand. Phosphene’s swam in his vision as he coiled in around the pain. God how could he have been so stupid? Now he had put Sebastian in danger too.  
“Niki” he cried out his voice hoarse and pain filled, unable to bring it above a whisper.  
The sound of footsteps almost overwhelming now to Kimi’s oversensitive ears, Kimi closed his eyes pulling a pillow over to cover his face hoping to stifle some of the noise and light that was making his head pulse in painful retches.  
“Lower the pillow boy, I can’t see anything with that shoved against your face” Niki’s voice came through the downy depths surprisingly gentle in the event of such panic, something that Kimi was eminently grateful for.  
“Cant” Kimi muttered “Hurts”  
He felt Niki’s hand, calm and reassuring on his arm “I know Kimi, but I need to see how far along you are”  
Kimi , lowered the pillow in tentative movements careful not to move to much at once less it aggravate his head that was spinning at an ever increasing velocity and was making his stomach want to relieve itself of the burden of his breakfast.  
Niki winced when he took a look at Kimi’s face. “oh mein got”  
Kimi gave the other man a tiered but rueful look “not good” he asked  
Niki snorted a little at that “very not good actually”  
Kimi sighed “so I understand it is too late to medicate this”  
Niki winced again “something like that” he said “I am afraid that there is little that I can do about the state of affairs now, you are just going to have to run this one through and hope for the best this time.” Niki placed an arm around his friend shoulders helping him into a painful and uncomfortable sitting position. “I told you inviting the young lord here was a terrible mistake, now what are we to do eh”  
Kimi shrugged he hadn’t a clue if he was honest but he doubted that such an announcement would go over to well with Niki as wound up over the whole affair as he already was.  
Niki gritted his teeth against what Kimi was sure was a cutting retort to the other man’s silence but he for once held his tongue. “come on we need to get you outside and as far away from the house as we can manage, being cooped up inside here is not going to do you any favours at all. We are just going to have to make as best of this as we can ok?”  
Kimi nodded accepting the much needed help to get to his feet with Niki taking almost all of his weight Kimi’s legs quaking beneath him as the pain from his arm spread outwards across his whole body leaving him in an almost senseless mass of pain. He wanted to ask Niki to stop to let him stay inside and sleep the attack off but he dared not, especially with Sebastian and his friend inside the house. Selfishly and perhaps because of vanity the last thing that Kimi wanted was for Sebastian to see him like this, it was the very last thing that he wanted Sebastian to know about.  
“I have been an idiot” he muttered.  
Niki laughed at that the harsh nature of Niki’s laugh piercing Kimi’s skull, “No argument here my friend”  
Kimi let out a small gust of breathy laughter Niki was never one to mince his words. “Wait here” Niki muttered setting Kimi down as carefully as he could on the wide stair at the bottom of the spiral walkway. “I’ll be back in a few minutes I just want to check the cost is clear”  
Kimi raised an eyebrow “it’s not like they don’t know we are here Niki”  
Niki raised an eyebrow “be that as it may I am fairly sure that they don’t know the state that you are in right now I imagine that such would come as quite a shock to our dear Mr Vettel”  
Kimi nodded conceding that Niki probably did have a very good point and curled up on the cold stairwell awaiting his friends return. God he hoped that Sebastian didn’t find out about this. Kimi had hoped naively perhaps that these attacks had begun to stop, over the past year there frequency had been diminishing but of course it was his lot for them to return just as Sebastian arrived, just as he had met someone he could imagine himself being happy with again.  
What a mess.  
He must have fallen asleep in the darkened staircase; the nest thing he knew Niki was hurriedly shaking his shoulder and, if possible he felt even worse than before.  
Niki’s face was creased with worry and there was a hurried urgency to him that had not been there before. “Come on Kimi; god it took an age to get you awake there.” He huffed “you’ve gotten to fat to carry out of here alone, come on move”  
Kimi allowed him his insult he knew that Niki always got extra crotchety when he was concerned for Kimi.  
“we will get you out to the hunting lodge that should be far enough away from the house and besides I don’t think that you will last out much more than that anyway.”  
Kimi was once again hauled to his feet the pain far more prominent now than it had been before, god this was awful, he always forgot how goddam terrible these attacks were.  
“Make sure you lock the doors after me ok, I don’t want Sebastian to find out”  
Niki nodded tersely.  
“Keep him safe Niki, whatever the cost” Kimi said “you keep him safe”


	10. the white wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastain finally finds out what kimi is and sebastain just may be the person Kimi has been waiting for his whole life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the super late update but the muses where sleeping and i was dealing with a lot these past few months but hey i updated eventually didnt i

Sebastian awoke to a pulsing in his head. He groaned lifting up a hand to touch a rather moist forehead; dammit he thought to himself, that was definitely blood. He wondered if it would be safe to sit up.  
Probably not, he concluded, even so much as pealing his eyelids apart left his head spinning nauseatingly. Millimetre by millimetre, Sebastian began the apparently arduous task of opening his eyes. Yet the moment Sebastian had completed the task he rather wished that he had not. Lying next to him and curled about Sebastian’s form was the giant white wolf Sebastian had seen out on the forecourt. He dared not move less the wolf sense it and act upon the movement, he slid his eyes over its body hoping that he head would stop spinning in time for him to make a break for it before the beast woke up.  
The white wolf had fallen asleep or so it appeared, it had seemed to have settled itself around Sebastian in an almost protective stance. What’s more it was snoring softly, or rather the lupine equivalent of such. On closer inspecting the beast did not seem quite so frightening, rather the fear had been a knee jerk reaction. The longer Sebastian lay there on the cold floor the safer he seemed to feel, he thought that the way the wolf had curled itself around Sebastian was the animals way of keeping him warm while watching the door way to keep the sleeping man safe from any danger.  
Sebastian smiled a little at that thought reaching up a pale hand to lay it against the wolfs surprisingly soft fur. “Didn’t do such a good job of staying awake though, “Sebastian murmured in a soft voice to the giant beast.  
The wolf stirred a little at that looking over at Seb with slitted blue eyes that for some reason seemed rather familiar. It placed its head a little closer to Seb, opening its large mouth a giant pink tongue hanging out like a dogs, panting enthusiastically it ran its tongue over Seb’s face, covering almost all of his features in wolf slobber. Seb laughed reaching up with his free hand to wipe his face dry.  
He leant his head against the wolfs flank, “maybe we should go sleep on the bed, as pleasant as the floor may be I am sure that we will regret this in the morning when we wake up”  
Sebastian got up slowly careful not to lose his balance the wolf pressed itself against Sebastian’s side lending him its steadying support, by now Seb had managed to convince himself that he was having a hallucination, well hallucination or not unless things started to get nasty Seb wasn’t going to argue with it. He wondered where Kimi was, he had promised to come to see Sebastian again, his absence left Seb feeling rather dejected. Yet despite that, he rather felt that the wolf made a an admirable replacement, it curled up on the duvet next to Seb, once again facing the door, he smirked a little, when however, after little more than two minutes on the bed the white wolf had fallen asleep and began, once again to snore against Seb’s check.  
Seb knotted his hand through the wolfs fur wanting to keep it within arm’s reach. He ran his hand up and down the wolfs back as he struggled to think around the thick fog that seemed to crowd every corner of his mind. The skin underneath the thick white fur, upon closer inspection seemed to be knotted and cause, like it had been burned, or scorched. Sebastian leant closer squinting in the dusky light as he attempted to get a better look at it. It appeared to be old wounds, he thought though he couldn’t be sure  
The sight of such pain, whether present or not filled Sebastian with a deep unsettling sadness, he wondered at that. He couldn’t seem to fathom why but this animal felt to dear to him, and so very familiar that he wanted not to let it go. Yet he couldn’t seem to keep his eyes open for long enough to think about it, he head was pounding still and Seb suspected that he had rather a bad case of concussion, yet try as he might he could not stay awake, whether or not he wanted to.  
Sebastian was long asleep when the heavy wooden door to his chambers creaked slowly open and a bold head poked its way in.  
Niki observed the scene in front of him with no small degree of shock, when he had heard what sounded like an earthquake breaking in through the kitchen door, he had raced up to bar the doors to the guests rooms, knowing that Kimi would be distraught if he found Sebastian hurt when he came back to himself.  
The sight he was met with was a shock to say the least. The boy was curled up asleep in the bed, a white wolf lay beside him, placid and calm, allowing its large flank to be used as a pillow by the boy. Niki had no idea what to make of it.  
The wolfs eyes watched Niki from across the room, small icy slits that tracked Niki’s every movement. Niki had never seen Kimi in this form so relaxed. He thought it better than to push his luck turning and stepping slowly from the room, he had rushed up here expecting to find a scene that would put even the most hardened crime scene detective to shame, he had been met instead by something… well something he couldn’t quite put his finger on. It was almost as if…. Niki shook his head that was not possible. It would however explain, no, his chastised himself, these things simply where not possible, not anymore. Besides Kimi had already met his mate, hadn’t he?  
Niki made his slow way back up the stairs and towards his room hidden in the secluded heights of the house. As he collapsed in his bed he half wondered why they were bothering hiding up here anymore it was quite clear that Sebastian knew that they were here, it was only a matter of time before his friends was informed of it too.  
Goddam Kimi, honestly the man was becoming far more trouble than he was worth, he could only hope that Kimi woke up and came back to himself before Sebastian returned to consciousness.  
****

Kimi awoke as the sun danced in through the open curtains. His limbs felt stiff and painful the way they always did after a change, the bed beneath him felt oddly soft, the way the bed at the hunting lodge never did. He opened his eyes gradually to combat the hungover spinning of his head.  
When Kimi’s eyes had adjusted to the light, he took in the room surrounding him, the soft blankets beneath him, the fine carpets, curtains and oh god… the body of Sebastian lying beside him. The other man was lying calmly beside him. Kimi’s heart stopped what if he had hurt him. His hands ghosted over Sebastian’s neck, checking for a pulse that was, thank god, there.  
Kimi’s hands skimmed the beautiful face of the man lying beside him, in what could only be described as the sleep of the dead. He noticed the cut on Sebastian’s head, his fingers skimmed over it. What had happened last night?  
His wolf form could sometimes be unpredictable but never had he found himself asleep in bed with men that he had only known a few weeks. Not to mention that the wolf wasn’t exactly known for being cuddly. Kimi in his other form was more known for fighting, or skulking away from people, he never sort them out, and certainly not in this way. It dint make any sense, at least not to him, it was almost as if his other form knew more than he did.  
Sebastian stirred beside him, making the first steps toward wakefulness; it was time to go he thought to himself. It would not do for Sebastian to see him, not like this anyway, whoever would have thought that the other one would become Kimi’s preferred form. At least the other one still had his good looks.  
Kimi rose slowly carful to move the bed as little as possible, Sebastian stirred no more. He slipped through the room like a ghost; with any luck Sebastian would chalk seeing a giant white wolf in his room down to having hit his head a little too hard on the window.

Sebastian came too slowly, feeling more rested that he had felt in many years, he reached out a hand hoping to still find the form of the white wolf lying beside him, but of course it was gone. Sebastian’s head was still spinning, though he felt far better than he had the night before. Sebastian sighed, this just seemed to be getting stranger and stranger, his life hadn’t exactly been normal to begin with, it was now however, getting down right movie from the 80’s strange.  
He couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that he knew the white wolf, it seemed so familiar, the way it had looked at him, the tilt of it head had reminded him of someone. He was done allowing Kimi or whatever he wanted to call himself, to slip in and out of his life. Surely he had been in the house last night, and beside he had been living here far longer than Seb and Jenson, maybe he knew something about white wolfs getting into the house, or at the very least be able to confirm Seb’s suspicions that it had all been a hallucination.  
Sebastian got up slowly careful not to stand too quickly lest he lose his tenuous grip on consciousness. He made his way from the room and towards the staircase hidden in the panels on the lobby, he glanced at the clock as he made his way down the stairs, just after 6am, good there was no way that Jenson would be awake yet, he couldn’t explain it, but he wanted Kimi to stay his secret for just a little longer.  
***  
Kimi pulled on a shirt that he been left slung over the Sofa by, presumably Niki, the night before, the man was remarkably messy. The shirt was a little big for him, more the better to hide himself, Kimi thought. The clocked chimed 6, the house was still and quite, Kimi doubted anyone would be awake for a good few hours. Sebastian especially, he had taken quite a blow to the head last night. Kimi collapsed onto the sofa, the aching of his limbs becoming too much, go how he hated the change; he thought that it was stopping.  
Before tonight he had only changed once in the last year, he had allowed himself to think that perhaps the curse was letting him go. No such luck however, since Sebastian had gotten here he had constantly felt on the edge of the change. It had filled his head, gradually creeping through him, the closer he seemed to get to Sebastian, it seemed, the closer he got to the change. The idea of throwing the man out crossed his mind for a brief moment, before he was able to dismiss the thought, yet the moment the plan formed his whole body seemed to rebel at it. No, his wolf seemed to shout, he is ours, we have to protect him, we have to keep him with us.  
Well, Kimi conceded, the other man was uncommonly good at getting himself into trouble maybe it would be better to keep him close. Kimi let the exhaustion caused by the change fill his limbs. He laid his head against the coach lettering himself slip back into blissful slumber, not hearing the creak of the stairs as the very man that seemed to occupy all of Kimi’s thoughts made his way up the winding staircase.

****  
Sebastian placed his hands against the heavy wooden door at the top of the spiral staircase, pushing it open, he winced as it creaked. The room seemed empty at first, quiet and empty except for a moth eaten coach in front of a dead grate. Sebastian stepped further into the room, the floor boards silent beneath his feet. The room so quiet, Sebastian near on had a heart attack as the room was suddenly filled with the most almighty snore.  
Sebastian grinned; making his was over to the sofa. Sprawled over the seating was Kimi. But he was not the young handsome man from the photograph; his face was a mottled ruin so much so that he was almost unrecognizable. Only the tatoos that peeked out beneeth the mans sleeve let sebastian know that the person from the photograph and the one before him now where one and the same. Sebastian took in the puckered red scars that ran the length of the man’s face. Hair in patches over his ruined scalp, and a mouth downturned as if someone had cut it in two; Sebastian stepped back in shock knocking over a glass as he did so. The other man bolted to attention, jolted out of his slumber his eyes met the shocked gaze of the man who had last night slept so peacefully beside him. Sebastian’s eyes were wide with shock and Kimi couldn’t bare his gaze.  
“Just go Sebastian, please just go.”


	11. clair du lune

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kimi remebers how to play the piono and may just be willing to let the past go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> see i havnt forgotten about this work

“No” Sebastian said “I don’t think I will”  
Kimi looked up in surprise, Sebastian and stepped closer and was watching him with curiosity not disgust. His eyes seemed to be asking for Kimi’s permission to come closer. Sebastian reached out a hand to Kimi a soft tentative smile on his face.   
“Is this why you didn’t want me to see you?” he asked in a soft voice   
Kimi nodded not trusting his voice to answer the other man.  
Sebastian smiled settling down on the sofa beside Kimi, “hey, it doesn’t bother me you know”  
Kimi raised an eye brow how could it not, he was hideous and Sebastian was so very beautiful “yeah right” he said “like I believe that, and if you dare say it not so bad I swear to god I will hit you”   
Sebastian snorted a little at that “well I wasn’t going to say that”   
Kimi smiled wirily. “What happened” asked Seb  
Kimi seemed to tense up at that, and Sebastian hastily began to backtrack. “You don’t have to tell me I’m just, I guess I’m always just too nosy for my own good.”  
Kimi gave him a tight lipped smile but didn’t meet his eyes, Seb reached out a hand taking Kimi’s in his. “It doesn’t bother me ok, and you don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to. How about you tell me why you have a dusty Grande piano, in the corner of the room, hidden by what has to be the most disgusting tarpaulin that I have ever seen”  
Kimi laughed at that the tension seeming to vanish from his shoulder at Sebastian’s attempt at humour “I used to play” he explained simply  
Sebastian seemed to light up at that “oh please tell me that you still do, I love music, would you please play to me”  
Kimi rolled his eyes at Sebastian’s exuberance “I am not sure that I really remember how to” he muttered   
Sebastian pouted, and it was adorable, Kimi thought to himself, he didn’t think that Seb had a hard time getting what he wanted “you must remember some songs” Sebastian persisted “just one or two please,”  
Kimi sighed getting up with great reluctance “fine, fine, fine, you impossible man. But I can’t promise that it will be anywhere near my usual ability”  
Kimi stalked over to the piano, reaching out with a ruined hand to pull the moth eaten cover off the grand piano, that had hidden for many a year, untouched in the corner of a half forgotten room, kept by a man who could barely bring himself to look at it. The poor instrument had deserved better. Dust emerged in a grey smog from the coverlet and filled the room around him, it danced in the air around him, splintering the sunlight and falling gradually to the floor like snow where it settled into its new home. Kimi brushed the dust from Niki’s shirt; the other man would not be pleased about this, oh well Kimi thought might teach him not to leave his things hanging around in the future.  
Kimi settled his hand over the keys, trying to remember the song that lingered in the back of his mind. They two had become dusty and covered in rust from disuse and neglect, he tried to think one of that would remind him of her, there were none. She had loved music, like Sebastian, with the same joy, her eyes had light up like Seb’s where now, at the thought of music being played.  
Seeing Kimi’s discomfort Sebastian came closer “do you know, Clair du lune,” he asked  
Kimi did, it had always been one of favourites, Minttu had never liked it though. He nodded slightly to Sebastian, his hand settling over the keys once more, he wondered if the piano was even still in tune. It probably sounded awful now, oh well, if it did he would be able to plead a broken instrument and then maybe Sebastian would leave. Maybe then Sebastian would stop looking at him with those beautiful sincere eyes. No such luck however, Kimi tested the first few notes ghosting his hand across the keys to gauge the sound, it was still as bight and clear as they day that he had first bought it.  
He had bought it for her. It seemed cruel that it had survived and she hadn’t, what right had he and this piano have to still be here when she and their little boy where gone. Sebastian’s small voice came from somewhere behind him.  
“you don’t have to you know, I won’t make you play if you don’t want to” he said, he sounded sad, as If somehow he understood the hollowness that filled the room, he understood Kimi’s morning without him having to say a word. Kimi could not explain how grateful he was for that.  
Kimi began to play feeling Sebastian’s presence behind his shoulder watching his ruined hands dance across the keys, he was surprised by how well he remembered it. He had thought that this two had been buried beneath years of grief and self-loathing. Music filled the silent room bouncing off the walls and making the hollow lifeless place seem alive for the first time in years. Kimi didn’t notice how wet his cheek had become until the music stopped at the room was once again filled with the echoing silence.  
Sebastian settled himself on the stool beside Kimi and his cheeks too where wet “thank you” he said in a quiet voice “that was the most beautiful thing I have ever heard”  
Kimi surprised even himself when he reached out covering Sebastian’s hand, which was clenched in his lap with his own. They sat there for a few long minuets, but it was ok, it wasn’t uncomfortable, because miraculously Sebastian understood, somehow he had heard it to, he felt it to. For a few beautiful moments, they sat together amount the swirling chaos of the world and just understood.  
Kimi raised his hands again encouraged by the soft silence of the man sat next to him. A happier tune this time, something that sounded vaguely like an Irish jig, Sebastian hummed along tapping his foot against the floor and bobbing his head to the music. Kimi smiled, for the first time in years. The feeling was unfamiliar.  
The tight skin on his face stretched uncomfortably, pulling at the scars that had made his face as delicate as paper, never the less it felt good. Sebastian seemed to fill the room with a soft warm light that seemed to lift the heaviness that had settled itself over Kimi for many a year, there was something special about Seb.  
Kimi turned to him “I am not nearly as good as I used to be I used to play this beautifully” he said rather sheepishly  
Sebastian smiled open and honest “I think it is beautiful” he murmured and Kimi couldn’t help the blush that spread across his face. He turned away not able to meet Seb’s eyes.  
By that time Sebastian had almost completely forgotten about the reason he had come up here in the first place, there was something captivating about Kimi’s presence that made him forget almost everything else. Kimi was as wrapped up in Sebastian as Seb was in him.  
Sebastian looked up from the piano keys where his eyes had lingered for the past few moments “I know who you are” he said “I thought you ought to know” Kimi paused for a moment going still in the chair wondering to what Sebastian was referring “I know that you are the lord of the manor, I know you are lord Raikkonen”   
Kimi let out the breath that he had been holding, good, he thought Sebastian hadn’t found out the full story yet. He had no doubt that it was only a matter of time before Sebastian ended up finding out the whole story. That he could handle, the rest however, the rest he decided it might be better if Sebastian did not know, at least for a while.  
The light was coming in through the window now stronger than it had been before, Kimi could feel it on the back of his neck, burning the soft damaged skin. Kimi got up moving out the sunlight, Sebastian’s eyes followed him across the room.   
“You should go” Kimi said at last  
Sebastian’s eyes flicked at that, like he wanted to stay. Kimi wondered at that he had, had so little contact with anyone for many a year that he wondered that he could be any such company for someone who was clearly as wonderful as Sebastian.  
Sebastian eventually nodded “ can I come back?” he asked  
Kimi looked away nodding not quite trusting himself to speak. Sebastian smiled; I’ll see you tomorrow night then. Sebastian picked up his jacket from when he had laid it over the moth eaten sofa, he had a goofy smile on his face and Kimi thought that he had never seen anything so beautiful in his life. Kimi’s eyes trailed him as he left the room.  
“I didn’t think it true” Niki announced from the corner where he had clearly been lurking  
“Just how long have you been standing there, has anyone told you that is creepy”  
“Long enough” retorted Niki deciding not to justify the rest of that comment with an answer  
Kimi raised an eyebrow well two could play at that game, he wouldn’t ask Niki what he meant it was clear that Niki wanted him to answer and Kimi wasn’t going to give him the gratification.  
Niki huffed clearly picking up on Kimi’s tactics, he had known Kimi long enough to know that in a competition of silence there could only be one winner and that most assuredly was not going to be him. “He is your mate, you know he is Kimi”  
Kimi shook his head “that impossible, Minttu was my mate”  
Niki smiled kindly “sometimes once every now and again, someone is lucky enough to be given a second chance, I think that Sebastian may just be your second chance.”  
Kimi shook his head “that is impossible you know it is”  
Niki snorted “you’re practically a professional at self-pity, but Kimi you have been given a once in a million chance to have the happiness that was taken away from you. I know that you might not think that you deserve It, but you do. I have seen how you care for the staff that you dismissed all those years ago, hell Kimi I don’t know who else would go on paying people that don’t even work for him anymore. You’re kind Kimi whether or not you want to admit it. What happened was not your fault. It’s about time that you realised that. You can’t let the past rule your life forever.”  
Kimi let Niki words sink in slowly and unsure he began to nod his head.  
Niki placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Not all at once, I understand that, its going to take time to let someone else in, I know that. All I am saying is give him a chance and give yourself a chance at happiness.”  
Kimi turned away from his friend, walking over to the large bay window he pushed open the curtains looking out over the grass. He watched as the figure of Sebastian emerged from the front door and made his way over the dewy grass. Sebastian made his way across the grass tilting his face up toward the faint warmth of the sun in the morning. He stood in the grass for a moment before picking up his feet and beginning to move again, Kimi smiled when the other man looked back over his shoulder tossing a wave toward the upstairs windows, where somehow by some instinct or another he knew that Kimi would be standing.  
Maybe Kimi though Niki was right maybe it was time to leave the past where it belonged


	12. the pretty blond

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kimi and seb go for a walk and someone looks on

“ok seb, spit it out” said jenson “it was cute to begin with now it’s just plain creepy”  
Sebastian raised an eyebrow at his friend “what are you talking about?”  
Jenson rolled his eyes at his friend “you know exactly what I mean Sebastian you’ve been smiling like a lunatic for about 3 hours now and its really starting to freak me out”  
Sebastian shot him an annoyed look “what I can’t smile anymore”  
Jenson snorted “not like that you can’t, want to tell me has gotten you so happy all of a sudden, did you take my advice and finally get laid”  
“Jenson!”  
“So .you did then?”  
“That” Sebastian responded “ is none of your business!”  
Jenson held up his arm in surrender “ok, have it your way, I’m going out, there’s an event going on down town I want to see if I can pick us up something nice for dinner” he got up winking at Sebastian “have a good afternoon”  
Sebastian drew in a sigh of relief when jenson left the room, he loved his friend he really did, but sometimes Jenson could be a bit trying. Sebastian lent back into the sofa thinking about what Kimi and he had talked about earlier that day/ night. How connected he felt to Kimi, how much he wanted to be with him. so much so that the rest of the world seemed to simply melt away whenever Kimi was there, like nothing else mattered, or would ever matter again.  
There was something of a magic in the air whenever he looked at Kimi, it was like nothing he had ever felt before. It was like there was something invisible tying the two men together, something that Sebastian could neither explain nor comprehend, he just knew that he never wanted to let it go. He wondered if Kimi felt the same way.  
Kimi who despite the scars that covered his face, seemed to be the most beautiful thing that Sebastian had ever seen, and his smile oh his smile . Those few moments when he had allowed himself to grin at Sebastian, had been the best moments of his life, the way that his heart had sped up at the sight of it, was like nothing that he had ever felt before and he never wanted to let it go.  
Seeing Kimi smile was like a drug. Once having seen and felt it there was nothing that Sebastian wanted more than, well more, more of listening to Kimi play, more of hearing his soft voice and even softer laugh, more of those light touches so gentle that they almost seemed to have been an accident, Sebastian just wanted more. Kimi seemed so self-conscious though, shying away from too long under Sebastian’s gaze. Preferring to keep his head tilted away from Sebastian just that little bit, so that he very rarely got a full look at him, it was clear that Kimi was very conscious of the scars that covered his face. Well Sebastian thought to himself he would just have to be patient with the other man, show him that he didn’t care that he still thought that Kimi was wonderful.  
Sebastian sighed, he was getting far to emotionally invested in a man he had met barely a few days ago. Though it was no use trying to convince himself to keep his distance, not to overwhelm Kimi. Once Sebastian had his heart set on something there was very little he or anyone else could do to make him change his mind. He would just have to hope that Kimi had a strong constitution for slightly needy men.  
He decided having nothing else to do, that he would try to convince Kimi to come out for a walk with him it looked like that poor man hadn’t been outside in ages, it would do him some good to get outside and it would hopefully take his mind of whatever it was that he seemed to spend most of his time brooding about. It wasn’t as if Kimi was an especially grumpy man he was just someone who always seemed to have something in his mind.  
Sebastian made his way up the stairs toward Kimi’s room, taking them two at a time excited to see Kimi again. He pushed open the door to the sparse room; Kimi was sat at the piano playing intently. He didn’t seem to hear Sebastian come in. Sebastian set on the arm of the moth eaten sofa and let the music wash over him. It was truly beautiful; Seb didn’t think he had heard anyone play as skilfully as Kimi. The mournful notes flooded over Sebastian and affected him in way that he had never thought possible. When Kimi played it was as if a magic filled the room, stripping the world of everything but the two men and the sound of those lonely notes.  
Kimi eventually realized that Sebastian had snuck into the room; he looked up smiling at Sebastian “I need to pay more attention I hadn’t heard you come in at all, very sneaky seb”  
Sebastian smiled at him “I was very quiet” he conceded “I didn’t want you to stop playing”  
Kimi smiled at him “I am not as good as I once was”  
Sebastian shook his head “I don’t think I have ever heard anything so wonderful as that in my life”  
“you’re too kind Seb” Kimi responded in a small voice  
Sebastian shook his head “I’m not I promise, anyway I dint come to argue with you about this, I was wondering if you wanted to come out for a walk with me”  
Kimi looked out the window, the sun was beating down heavily on the lawns below and it would be hell on his skin, he’d have to wear that dreadful mask, usually the thought of wearing it filled him with an embarrassed fear, even more so that his face gave to him on a regular basis. He face was ugly now but at least it was what it was. Wearing the mask felt like a futile way of pretending like nothing had ever happened, Kimi felt as if he deserved to feel every uncomfortable pinch of the burned skin, to feel every stare. To know without a shadow of a doubt that his life would never be the same again, that he would never be able to find the happiness that he had before, and that he deserved that. Yet there was something about Sebastian that made him want to put all of that behind him, to once again find the strength to live. To move on from the past. And besides he knew that if Niki found him outside without his mask he would have to qualms about skinning him alive and Kimi was not in the mood for that today.  
He smiled at Sebastian “sure” he said “I just have to get something first, but you have to promise not to laugh at me”  
Seb smiled back at him happiness lighting up, he hadn’t really thought that Kimi would agree to go with him and he was pleasantly surprised at Kimi’s agreement.  
“Promise Sebastian” prompted Kimi  
Seb’s smile grew impossibly wide “promise” he replied  
He disappeared for a few moments coming back with his face hidden from Seb, his shoulders shaking with laughter at Sebastian annoyed grumbles “ok, eyes closed Seb”  
“not this again” Sebastian complained but diligently covered his eyes from the other man.  
Kimi turned around slowly laughing at the sight of Sebastian with his eyes screwed tightly shut and his hands placed over them. “ok Seb, you can open your eyes now”  
Sebastian slowly lifted his hand from his eyes and Kimi was filled with a nervous dread, he couldn’t put his finger on why, it wasn’t as if Sebastian hadn’t seen his face before. Yet somehow this was different it felt like he was admitting that there was something wrong with him, that there was something so visible that everyday made him feel like a monster. It was a feeling in the pit of his stomach that this would somehow prompt that same thoughts in Sebastian, that he would see Kimi like this and realize that there was something in Kimi worth hiding from, that maybe he should be hiding away from Kimi too. The moment of fear and tension was broken by Sebastian’s laugh and quick stopping of thus.  
“oh ops, sorry I promised that I wouldn’t laugh didn’t I, it was just the shock of it” he said with a grin “wow Kimi that’s so cool, it make you look like, like I don’t know but wow, you look amazing”  
Well that was not exactly the reaction that he had been expecting but he’d take it and run with it. He drew in a deep breath, “ok I’m ready to go when you are”  
Niki choose that moment to stick his head in from another room where he had been listening in to the conversation for god knows how long “you two love bird have fun “ he said “and Sebastian, do make sure that Kimi doesn’t stay too long outside that man has no sense at all when left to his own devices”  
Kimi glared at Niki as the other man chuckled in amusement, “and don’t go swimming, the memories god the memories, I will never be able to get those image's out of my head”  
Sebastian shot Kimi a confused look “what on earth is he talking about.”  
Kimi applied a little more pressure to Sebastian’s back as he led him from the room, “don’t ask any questions just keep walking.”  
Sebastian did, but couldn’t quite manage to restrain himself from laughing.

***  
Kimi led Sebastian over to the cool of the treeline carful to keep out of the sun for as much as was possible, the sun even in spring time was far too bright for his liking and he could feel it stinging the skin that peaked out from beneath the mask. Niki had once suggested that he wear a sun hat, but even Kimi, aware that he already looked completely ridiculous drew the line at that.  
They walked amongst the trees keeping out of direct light, but Sebastian didn’t seem to mind. They picked there way though the ferns, Sebastian smiling and Kimi content to listen to the other man enthusiastic chatter. At one point he felt Sebastian’s hand brush against his and instead of letting it go, Kimi reached out with his finger tips and intertwined their hands together. He heard Sebastian let out a breath of surprise as Kimi pulled him to sit on a log beside him. Sebastian lent his head against Kimi’s shoulder careful not to dislodge the mask. Kimi clearly hated the thing but Sebastian thought it was actually quite alluring, it made Kimi look mysterious and very very handsome, not that Seb thought, Kimi needed any help in that area.  
Sebastian looked out at the land beneath them, it was beautiful, the sun filtered in through the trees and below them the lake glistened in the sunlight blue and inviting.  
Sebastian wondered what Niki had been referring to earlier, Kimi clearly catching on to the other man’s train of thought let out a little laugh “don’t ask Sebastian, because I will never ever tell you that story”  
Sebastian smiled up at him “maybe you won’t but I bet after having had a sufficient amount of alcohol in his system Niki might.”  
Kimi gave him a dirty look “I hate you”  
“no you don’t”  
***  
The man knelt down in the bushes watching the figures of the two men he had followed from near the house. He watched as one, a blonde laid his head on the shoulder of his target. The man smiled this would be easier than he had thought.  
Yes Kimi had to go, he twisted his hands around each other as he thought, he had to go. The man knew that, but by god he wouldn’t let the bastard die quickly and he would make the bastard suffer first.  
Maybe he thought to himself, if he killed this pretty young blond, Kimi might just finish the job off himself.


End file.
